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Each Monday, we are posting on a chapter of the Lies Women Believe book by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. This week, Nancy covers some of the Lies Women Believe about Sin. One of the things I've been pondering in preparation for this study is the fact that sin often presents itself as the solution to the very problems it causes. I wrote about this in depth in a post last year called Peeling Back the Layers, where I shared about my struggle with food. When tempted to disobey what we know God wants for us, Satan often appeals to our flesh....
"You don't need all these restrictions. Don't you just want to be free from the rules? You can have what you want...you should be able to have what you want."
The truth is that, while sin feels good at first...indulging in whatever it is we're tempted to indulge in at that moment, it leads to bondage, which is the opposite of freedom. It was the same with Eve. Satan is truly a master deceiver....and He will often promise to free you when He truly means to entangle you beyond what you could imagine.
As Nancy writes, "Though it may entertain us, play with us, sleep with us, and amuse us, its nature never changes. Inevitably, it will always rise up to bite and devour those who befriend it."
Lie Number Thirteen ~ "I can sin and get away with it."
We see this all the time, don't we? We are so bathed in mercy and grace, sometimes we take advantage of that free gift. We get comfortable in our sin...thinking that there will be no consequence or maybe underestimating the consequences. If we truly realized the cost of our sin, we would never even dabble with it.
The Truth ~
We will reap what we sow...Gen. 3:4-5, Gal. 6:7-8
If we play with fire, we will get burned...we will not escape sin's consequences...
Psalm 32:1-5, Eccl. 8:12, 12:13-14, James 1:13-15
Lie Number Fourteen ~ My sin isn't really that bad.
My friend Dinah always refers to these as "pet sins". We get so used to them. They seem harmless. We almost accept them as just who we are....our little quirks.
The Truth ~ Every act of sin is an act of rebellion against God. Rom. 5:6-7, I John 1:5-10
Lie Number Fifteen ~ God can't forgive what I've done.
This is probably the one Satan uses the most with me. He will often parade all my sins in front of me. Something from the past I'd rather forget. Stealing my joy and confidence, convincing me that I'm not forgiven, not covered by the blood of Jesus, not redeemed by His grace. That I'm still that girl. The shame of sin weighs heavily as He spews the lies. It's not a weight we're supposed to carry....or a weight we're strong enough to carry. Instead, Jesus has redeemed us when He paid the debt for all our sins on the cross...we no longer have to buckle under sin's weight. He gave us a new identity in Him. I am not that lost, broken girl...I am His girl. His redeemed, beautiful, covered in grace...forgiven girl.
The Truth ~
The blood of Jesus is enough to cover ANY and EVERY sin we have committed. ( See: I John 1:7)
There is NO sin too great for God to forgive. (See: Psalm 85:10 130:3-4)
God's grace is greater than the greatest sin. (See: Rom. 3:24, 5:11-14)
Lie Number Sixteen ~ I am not fully responsible for my actions and reactions.
Excuses, excuses, excuses....
We have a ton of them...especially in today's culture. We have a name and corresponding excuse for every behavior and "condition" that plagues the human race. But....but...but....there is a reason why I did it. It was my hormones, my broken heart, the fact that my needs weren't being met, I was tired, hungry, sick. Blah...blah...blah. At least that's what I'm saying to myself tonight as I think of how at times, I can be the Queen of Excuses.
The Truth ~
I am not responsible for the actions of others...
Gen. 3:11-13
But I am responsible for my own actions and choices.
Psalm 51:1-10, Phil. 4:8-9, Col. 3:1-17
Funny...this is something we tell the children at school. Interesting that we continue to struggle with this as adults! ;)
Lie Number Seventeen ~ I cannot walk in consistent victory over sin.
This one is tough. It is difficult to walk in consistent victory over the sin that plagues us. After all, we will battle our fleshly desire to sin for as long as we walk this earth. But...
The Truth is...
...we do not have to give up and assume defeat. We ARE able to have victory. We are able to "all things through Jesus Christ who gives us strength". Even overcome sins that have held us captive. We have been set free. We are not slaves to sin, but free in Jesus. (John 8:31-32, 36;14:6; Romans 6:6-7, Gal. 5:1, Heb. 10:10, Corinth. 6:9-11)
You have been set free from sin and have become slaves of righteousness...through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. ~ Romans 6:18;8:2
I have really enjoyed the wisdom and truth...and even the conviction of this study. (Even though, it's totally kicking my butt in a lot of ways!) Please share your thoughts in the comments and Blog Frog Discussion. I know many of you are behind on the reading. That's o.k...just stick with it and come back to share your heart when you're able. Next week, we will be covering an area where I struggle often....Lies Women Believe about Priorities. Yikes...I feel some conviction just typing that. It's going to be a great study! =)
Monday, January 31, 2011
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Women of Faith Winner
And....the Winner of the Women of Faith Ticket Giveaway is...
Mattie from Beauty Will Rise
Whoooo- Hoo! Congratulations Mattie...can't wait to meet you in person!
If you didn't win and would like to join us at the Women of Faith Conference in Columbus, Ohio please email me for information on how you can order a ticket and sit with the Sufficient Grace group.
Mattie from Beauty Will Rise
Whoooo- Hoo! Congratulations Mattie...can't wait to meet you in person!
If you didn't win and would like to join us at the Women of Faith Conference in Columbus, Ohio please email me for information on how you can order a ticket and sit with the Sufficient Grace group.
Friday, January 28, 2011
Doing Our Best with the Shot We're Given and Other Musings from the Wee Hours of the Morning
I stood at the counter in the dentist's office this week, attempting to schedule our next appointment. I was thinking out loud about the best time for our oldest son, Timothy, to go for his check-up in August, since he would be back in the thick of golf season by then. I fumbled for a moment and stopped.
The receptionist said, "I know...isn't it a pain to schedule around all these things our kids are involved in?"
I replied, "It isn't that...it's just. This is the last time I will be scheduling a dentist appointment around his golf season. He will be a senior by then...and this will be his last golf season."
I won't lie. I did get a little teary in the middle of the checkout line at the dentist's office. And, the moms who have walked through this season of parenting nodded with understanding and a knowing compassion in their eyes. They get it. They know what it's like to walk around forever with your heart outside of your body...to pour your heart and soul into the loving and training of this person...to learn to love what they love and spend endless hours watching them do what they love, encouraging them to blossom into the person they were created to be....nurturing their gifts...praying endless prayers for them...listening to their dreams...dreaming your own dreams for their lives...and learning to let go of some of those dreams, trading them for new dreams.
Everyone says it goes by in a blink...to cherish the time and soak in every moment. Everyone says it because it is true. When our babies are tiny and filling our arms, we find it hard to believe that there will ever come a day when they will not need us. They spend their formative years under our wings, being shaped and molded, loved and protected. But, it is a fleeting season. And, the seasons that come next can be a surprise. At least they were for me. I wasn't prepared for all the letting go and trusting God that goes on in the parenting of a child.
I was talking to a friend recently about some things her child is struggling with. And, in recent years, I have reflected on this concept with my own children and the children I work with in elementary school. She mentioned the idea that he is "broken". That is a hard one for us, isn't it? As mothers, we don't ever want something to be broken in our children. We don't want them to struggle, or suffer, or face obstacles to overcome. Life is hard enough.
But, as we talked, and as I've been reflecting in the wee hours of another day that is beginning at around 2:30am....the truth is...
We're all broken.
Everyone is broken in some way. We all face obstacles, struggle with weaknesses, have little quirks. I recently had a conversation with one of the students in our classroom making the comment, "That's not fair" about something with which he was disgruntled. I told him gently and lovingly that in my house, my children were not allowed to say that phrase. "We are all different in our own way. All of us are living our own lives.We are all created unique in our own way, with different abilities and needs, strengths and weaknesses. Life isn't about fair. We do the best we can with what we are given, and do not worry about what someone else is given." (Don't get me wrong. I am compassionate with my kids that life sometimes is a bummer and hard things happen. I just don't want them wallowing in whether or not something is fair...or spending time comparing their own lot in life with someone else. It is a fruitless endeavor.)
My son loves to golf, and he's pretty good at it. He often says that the best place to be mentally on the golf course is not hoping or expecting to hit the perfect shot every time. It's being able to do the best with the shot you're given. Instead of throwing in the towel when you get a bad lie or things don't go your way, or a shot veers off to the left or right, you ask yourself, "O.K., what's the best I can do right now....with this shot...from right where I am." You cannot dwell on the regret that the previous shot didn't work out...and you can't try and make up for it by overcompensating on your next shot. You can only play this shot...the one you are given right now.
In life, we can only do the best with what we are given. Dwelling on the "what-ifs" and "if onlys" does nothing to change our circumstances. And, neither does worrying about the future. What we have learned in our own lives about being broken, is that there is beauty in the brokenness. Some of the most precious gifts of this life come from the broken places. It's easier sometimes, to apply those lessons to ourselves, but not so easy when it comes to our children. We don't want them to have any broken places. But, without some of the brokenness in this life, we would miss some of the most precious beauty.
There are many prayers I've prayed for my children, but there are a few things that stand out as I look into this new season of parenting, feeling all reflective and sentimental. Of course, I pray for them to be godly young men, compassionate and soft hearted as well as strong and sure, and that they would marry godly women. I pray that they will use their gifts and abilities to serve the Lord. But, these three stand out.
Number One....I pray that my boys would love Jesus...that they would know Him intimately as their Savior and Lord. That they would live their lives for Him.
Number Two...I pray that they would honor God with their lives and that they would honor their family, as well.
Number three...I pray that they would be confident in the person each was created to be...comfortable in their own skin...unwavering in their convictions.
We can't make things perfect for our kids. We can't protect them from every injustice and ensure that their lives flow smoothly, free from any obstacles. In fact, quite the opposite. We must prepare our children for the bumps they will inevitably face along their journey through life in this imperfect and quite broken world. We must help them build a sure foundation that will not crumble when the storms of life come rushing in.
And, one more thing that seems important to mention in the wee hours of this morning, after wrestling with my own concerns for my children and my own imperfections as their mother, once more laying it all at the feet of Jesus: Know that you are covered in grace. I'm so grateful that, in the darkness of night, when all my failures seem so glaringly evident, I can simply pray that God would cover my family with His grace. That He would cover the areas where I have fallen short, the things I've neglected, the opportunities I missed, times when I was less than I could have been, or didn't know the best way to do it. He's big enough to cover it all...and more than able.
Plus...He's faithful...even when I'm not.
The receptionist said, "I know...isn't it a pain to schedule around all these things our kids are involved in?"
I replied, "It isn't that...it's just. This is the last time I will be scheduling a dentist appointment around his golf season. He will be a senior by then...and this will be his last golf season."
I won't lie. I did get a little teary in the middle of the checkout line at the dentist's office. And, the moms who have walked through this season of parenting nodded with understanding and a knowing compassion in their eyes. They get it. They know what it's like to walk around forever with your heart outside of your body...to pour your heart and soul into the loving and training of this person...to learn to love what they love and spend endless hours watching them do what they love, encouraging them to blossom into the person they were created to be....nurturing their gifts...praying endless prayers for them...listening to their dreams...dreaming your own dreams for their lives...and learning to let go of some of those dreams, trading them for new dreams.
Everyone says it goes by in a blink...to cherish the time and soak in every moment. Everyone says it because it is true. When our babies are tiny and filling our arms, we find it hard to believe that there will ever come a day when they will not need us. They spend their formative years under our wings, being shaped and molded, loved and protected. But, it is a fleeting season. And, the seasons that come next can be a surprise. At least they were for me. I wasn't prepared for all the letting go and trusting God that goes on in the parenting of a child.
I was talking to a friend recently about some things her child is struggling with. And, in recent years, I have reflected on this concept with my own children and the children I work with in elementary school. She mentioned the idea that he is "broken". That is a hard one for us, isn't it? As mothers, we don't ever want something to be broken in our children. We don't want them to struggle, or suffer, or face obstacles to overcome. Life is hard enough.
But, as we talked, and as I've been reflecting in the wee hours of another day that is beginning at around 2:30am....the truth is...
We're all broken.
Everyone is broken in some way. We all face obstacles, struggle with weaknesses, have little quirks. I recently had a conversation with one of the students in our classroom making the comment, "That's not fair" about something with which he was disgruntled. I told him gently and lovingly that in my house, my children were not allowed to say that phrase. "We are all different in our own way. All of us are living our own lives.We are all created unique in our own way, with different abilities and needs, strengths and weaknesses. Life isn't about fair. We do the best we can with what we are given, and do not worry about what someone else is given." (Don't get me wrong. I am compassionate with my kids that life sometimes is a bummer and hard things happen. I just don't want them wallowing in whether or not something is fair...or spending time comparing their own lot in life with someone else. It is a fruitless endeavor.)
My son loves to golf, and he's pretty good at it. He often says that the best place to be mentally on the golf course is not hoping or expecting to hit the perfect shot every time. It's being able to do the best with the shot you're given. Instead of throwing in the towel when you get a bad lie or things don't go your way, or a shot veers off to the left or right, you ask yourself, "O.K., what's the best I can do right now....with this shot...from right where I am." You cannot dwell on the regret that the previous shot didn't work out...and you can't try and make up for it by overcompensating on your next shot. You can only play this shot...the one you are given right now.
In life, we can only do the best with what we are given. Dwelling on the "what-ifs" and "if onlys" does nothing to change our circumstances. And, neither does worrying about the future. What we have learned in our own lives about being broken, is that there is beauty in the brokenness. Some of the most precious gifts of this life come from the broken places. It's easier sometimes, to apply those lessons to ourselves, but not so easy when it comes to our children. We don't want them to have any broken places. But, without some of the brokenness in this life, we would miss some of the most precious beauty.
There are many prayers I've prayed for my children, but there are a few things that stand out as I look into this new season of parenting, feeling all reflective and sentimental. Of course, I pray for them to be godly young men, compassionate and soft hearted as well as strong and sure, and that they would marry godly women. I pray that they will use their gifts and abilities to serve the Lord. But, these three stand out.
Number One....I pray that my boys would love Jesus...that they would know Him intimately as their Savior and Lord. That they would live their lives for Him.
Number Two...I pray that they would honor God with their lives and that they would honor their family, as well.
Number three...I pray that they would be confident in the person each was created to be...comfortable in their own skin...unwavering in their convictions.
We can't make things perfect for our kids. We can't protect them from every injustice and ensure that their lives flow smoothly, free from any obstacles. In fact, quite the opposite. We must prepare our children for the bumps they will inevitably face along their journey through life in this imperfect and quite broken world. We must help them build a sure foundation that will not crumble when the storms of life come rushing in.
And, one more thing that seems important to mention in the wee hours of this morning, after wrestling with my own concerns for my children and my own imperfections as their mother, once more laying it all at the feet of Jesus: Know that you are covered in grace. I'm so grateful that, in the darkness of night, when all my failures seem so glaringly evident, I can simply pray that God would cover my family with His grace. That He would cover the areas where I have fallen short, the things I've neglected, the opportunities I missed, times when I was less than I could have been, or didn't know the best way to do it. He's big enough to cover it all...and more than able.
Plus...He's faithful...even when I'm not.
Monday, January 24, 2011
Lies Women Believe ~ Chapter Three: Lies Women Believe about Themselves (Updated)
Each Monday, we are reviewing a chapter from the Lies Women Believe and the Truth that Sets Them Free book by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. This week, we are covering the Lies Women Believe about Themselves. I know several are reading along, but many have mentioned they are behind. I hope you will all stick with this book and join in some of the discussion...whether in the comments of these posts or in the Blog Frog Discussion. It is my hope and prayer that we may be an encouragement to one another in the areas that many women struggle with in their walk.
Let's dig in. I'll warn you. Nancy doesn't mess around in this book. She tells it like it is, blowing to pieces many of the excuses women often use for their sins and shortcomings. And, in the frame of mind I have been in lately, I have to say: I'm loving it! I am so tired of being complacent and sluggish in my walk and in my life. You might wonder what I mean, since it looks like I'm quite busy with my family, work, and serving the Lord. I am busy...that's true. But, my joy has been lagging for awhile. And, I've mentioned several times allowing myself to grow weary and distracted. It's a constant battle...to stay focused, to resist weariness, to fix our eyes on Jesus, to seek Him and turn away from the things of this world. I'm a little tired of just treading water, when I know God has so much more planned for my life. (Now that I said that....I need to ask for prayer...because no doubt, the attack is coming! Let's get our armor on!!)
Lie Number Seven:
I'm Not Worth Anything
The Truth:
Our value is not determined by what others think of us or what we think of ourselves. Our value is determined by how God views us.
How does God view us?
Psalm 139 tells us we are fearfully and wonderfully made, that we are known by Him, and loved by Him. His thoughts to us are more than can be counted. He knew us before we were formed in our mother's womb and fashioned our days before we took a breath.
Romans 5:6-8 tells us that while were were still sinners Christ died for us. God gave His only son...while we were filthy and covered in sin, rejecting Him....He gave Him to die in our place....to make a way for us to be saved. That is how great His love is....He came for us.
In Ephesians 1:3-8, we find that we are blessed, chosen, accepted, adopted, and redeemed....all for His good pleasure.
That is how precious and worthy we are....not because of anything we did. We find our worth in Him....because He gives us value...because we are forgiven and covered by the blood of Jesus....because we are His.
Lie Number Eight:
I Need to Learn to Love Myself
The Truth:
By faith, I need to receive God's love for me.
I already love myself. I need to deny myself and let God love others through me.
This lie is something we are fed by the world's philosophy so often, we may not realize how much it has woven it's way into our thinking. And, not to ruffle any feathers, but it's such Bologna! As Nancy writes, "Our problem isn't so much a 'poor self-image' as it is a 'poor God-image'. Our need is not to love ourselves more but to receive His incredible love for us and to accept His design and purpose for our lives."
She also writes, "Jesus taught us that it is in losing our lives that we find our lives."
And later: "We naturally love ourselves; we do not naturally love others."
My friend Betsy says a phrase that really speaks truth to this deception: She says "Me time is overrated." I like that. We think we need to indulge ourselves more....when really we need to focus less on ourselves and more on others. You know what's funny about that? We often find more contentment in denying ourselves and serving His purpose than we do when we try to indulge ourselves.
Lie Number Nine:
I Can't Help the Way I Am
Excuses, excuses, excuses. I can be the queen of them, that's for sure. It's easy to get swept into the deception that our past mistakes define us....or the idea that who we are, or who our parents are, or the circumstances of our lives, determines how we should live and think. For instance, if someone was abused, they may think that they are doomed to be an abuser or marry an abuser....continuing the cycle of what they have known, feeling like they are destined to live this way, locked in bondage. This lie even goes so far as to give us an excuse for any reaction based on our circumstances....hormones, past, tiny house, difficult job, our feelings, the way our family always did things is the way we have to. All of those ideas allow the circumstances to dictate how we react and behave. We do not have to continue living this way...as if we haven't been set free. We are free in Him....we do not need to be slaves of our circumstances and we are not defined by them. This is something I have battled from time to time. I'm grateful for the reminder.
The truth is:
We have the choice to obey God, and as His child, we are able to do so. We can be changed by His Holy Spirit. Our circumstances do not need to dictate our behavior.
Lie Number Ten:
I Have My Rights
The Truth:
Claiming rights leads to bondage....yielding rights sets me free.
Yikes....this one is a toughy. The emotions and feelings we women face are strong...and hard to resist. We feel we have a right to be angry when we are wronged or someone fails to meet our expectations.The right to be dissatisfied when things don't go the way we want. We have a right to certain things...comfort, to be happy, to be loved, to have a good job, to have certain things, to live a certain way. As Americans, we are very good at claiming "our rights". Don't get me wrong, I am grateful for the gift of freedom that we are afforded as Americans, but we need to remember that we are not entitled to have things go our way all the time. Staking claim on our rights leads to a lot of trouble.
I like what Nancy says to combat this lie: The fact is, successful relationships and healthy cultures are not built on the claiming of rights, but by on the yielding of rights.
Lie Number Eleven:
Physical Beauty Matters More Than Inner Beauty
The Truth:
The beauty that matters to God is our inner spirit...He looks at the heart.
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
~Proverbs 31:30
I'll be honest. I say that this one is not an issue for me. I say that of course, I believe that inner beauty is more important than outer beauty....eternally speaking. But, I don't always live that way. I struggle with the idea of getting older sometimes. And, more and more, I notice the way younger women look, and sometimes even feel a twinge of envy. I don't like to admit that ugliness...and try not to dwell there. But, it pops up every once in awhile. I'm not just disappointed in myself for going to God instead of food, because it is wrong spiritually. It bothers me to gain weight because I don't like how I look physically. My gray hair and other imperfections bother me. I don't always see myself the way God sees me. There is nothing wrong with caring how we look and trying to look nice for our husbands, and for ourselves. We should after all, do those things. But, looks should not be more important than the attitude of our hearts. My friend Monica did a great post recently on the deception of physical beauty, and some of the messed up views we women have on the subject.
Lie Number Twelve:
I Should Not Have to Live With Unfulfilled Longings
The Truth:
We will always have unfulfilled longings this side of heaven. (Rom. 8:23)
Nothing and no one on this earth can fulfill us.
Longings on this earth create a desire for God and heaven.
We are inundated with this lie in our culture. There is a quick fix for everything it seems. Worldly philosophy which tells us that every longing we have should be fulfilled. Satisfy your needs with a how-to book, a vacation, a new look, a "deep-dish pizza" as Nancy says or you know...some people might choose a bag of Doritos. Same idea. Same lie. Same bondage. These things we look to will never satisfy us. In fact, they will leave us feeling more empty in the end. We have been created with what some call a "God-sized hole in our hearts"...a longing that only He can fill.
What Lies do you struggle with about yourself? And, what Truth do you need to cling to to free yourself from that way of thinking?
I need to remember to look to the Lord to fulfill all my longings. I also need to remember that the opinions of others do not define my worth. I am not defined by my past or by the actions of others. I am worthy because I am His....I am loved perfectly and completely by the Lord. I need to guard my thoughts and search my motives. Remain in the word and in prayer daily.
This song by JJ Heller pretty much sums it up:
Praying for you this week...and appreciate your prayers for me as well. Please stick with this ladies. I would love to hear your thoughts on this week's topic. Next week, we will be covering Chapter Four: Lies Women Believe About Sin.
Love to all...
P.S. Scroll down to the post below for an exciting opportunity to be blessed and encouraged with the ladies of SGM at the Women of Faith Conference in Columbus, Ohio.
Let's dig in. I'll warn you. Nancy doesn't mess around in this book. She tells it like it is, blowing to pieces many of the excuses women often use for their sins and shortcomings. And, in the frame of mind I have been in lately, I have to say: I'm loving it! I am so tired of being complacent and sluggish in my walk and in my life. You might wonder what I mean, since it looks like I'm quite busy with my family, work, and serving the Lord. I am busy...that's true. But, my joy has been lagging for awhile. And, I've mentioned several times allowing myself to grow weary and distracted. It's a constant battle...to stay focused, to resist weariness, to fix our eyes on Jesus, to seek Him and turn away from the things of this world. I'm a little tired of just treading water, when I know God has so much more planned for my life. (Now that I said that....I need to ask for prayer...because no doubt, the attack is coming! Let's get our armor on!!)
Lie Number Seven:
I'm Not Worth Anything
The Truth:
Our value is not determined by what others think of us or what we think of ourselves. Our value is determined by how God views us.
How does God view us?
Psalm 139 tells us we are fearfully and wonderfully made, that we are known by Him, and loved by Him. His thoughts to us are more than can be counted. He knew us before we were formed in our mother's womb and fashioned our days before we took a breath.
Romans 5:6-8 tells us that while were were still sinners Christ died for us. God gave His only son...while we were filthy and covered in sin, rejecting Him....He gave Him to die in our place....to make a way for us to be saved. That is how great His love is....He came for us.
In Ephesians 1:3-8, we find that we are blessed, chosen, accepted, adopted, and redeemed....all for His good pleasure.
That is how precious and worthy we are....not because of anything we did. We find our worth in Him....because He gives us value...because we are forgiven and covered by the blood of Jesus....because we are His.
Lie Number Eight:
I Need to Learn to Love Myself
The Truth:
By faith, I need to receive God's love for me.
I already love myself. I need to deny myself and let God love others through me.
This lie is something we are fed by the world's philosophy so often, we may not realize how much it has woven it's way into our thinking. And, not to ruffle any feathers, but it's such Bologna! As Nancy writes, "Our problem isn't so much a 'poor self-image' as it is a 'poor God-image'. Our need is not to love ourselves more but to receive His incredible love for us and to accept His design and purpose for our lives."
She also writes, "Jesus taught us that it is in losing our lives that we find our lives."
And later: "We naturally love ourselves; we do not naturally love others."
My friend Betsy says a phrase that really speaks truth to this deception: She says "Me time is overrated." I like that. We think we need to indulge ourselves more....when really we need to focus less on ourselves and more on others. You know what's funny about that? We often find more contentment in denying ourselves and serving His purpose than we do when we try to indulge ourselves.
Lie Number Nine:
I Can't Help the Way I Am
Excuses, excuses, excuses. I can be the queen of them, that's for sure. It's easy to get swept into the deception that our past mistakes define us....or the idea that who we are, or who our parents are, or the circumstances of our lives, determines how we should live and think. For instance, if someone was abused, they may think that they are doomed to be an abuser or marry an abuser....continuing the cycle of what they have known, feeling like they are destined to live this way, locked in bondage. This lie even goes so far as to give us an excuse for any reaction based on our circumstances....hormones, past, tiny house, difficult job, our feelings, the way our family always did things is the way we have to. All of those ideas allow the circumstances to dictate how we react and behave. We do not have to continue living this way...as if we haven't been set free. We are free in Him....we do not need to be slaves of our circumstances and we are not defined by them. This is something I have battled from time to time. I'm grateful for the reminder.
The truth is:
We have the choice to obey God, and as His child, we are able to do so. We can be changed by His Holy Spirit. Our circumstances do not need to dictate our behavior.
Lie Number Ten:
I Have My Rights
The Truth:
Claiming rights leads to bondage....yielding rights sets me free.
Yikes....this one is a toughy. The emotions and feelings we women face are strong...and hard to resist. We feel we have a right to be angry when we are wronged or someone fails to meet our expectations.The right to be dissatisfied when things don't go the way we want. We have a right to certain things...comfort, to be happy, to be loved, to have a good job, to have certain things, to live a certain way. As Americans, we are very good at claiming "our rights". Don't get me wrong, I am grateful for the gift of freedom that we are afforded as Americans, but we need to remember that we are not entitled to have things go our way all the time. Staking claim on our rights leads to a lot of trouble.
I like what Nancy says to combat this lie: The fact is, successful relationships and healthy cultures are not built on the claiming of rights, but by on the yielding of rights.
Lie Number Eleven:
Physical Beauty Matters More Than Inner Beauty
The Truth:
The beauty that matters to God is our inner spirit...He looks at the heart.
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
~Proverbs 31:30
I'll be honest. I say that this one is not an issue for me. I say that of course, I believe that inner beauty is more important than outer beauty....eternally speaking. But, I don't always live that way. I struggle with the idea of getting older sometimes. And, more and more, I notice the way younger women look, and sometimes even feel a twinge of envy. I don't like to admit that ugliness...and try not to dwell there. But, it pops up every once in awhile. I'm not just disappointed in myself for going to God instead of food, because it is wrong spiritually. It bothers me to gain weight because I don't like how I look physically. My gray hair and other imperfections bother me. I don't always see myself the way God sees me. There is nothing wrong with caring how we look and trying to look nice for our husbands, and for ourselves. We should after all, do those things. But, looks should not be more important than the attitude of our hearts. My friend Monica did a great post recently on the deception of physical beauty, and some of the messed up views we women have on the subject.
Lie Number Twelve:
I Should Not Have to Live With Unfulfilled Longings
The Truth:
We will always have unfulfilled longings this side of heaven. (Rom. 8:23)
Nothing and no one on this earth can fulfill us.
Longings on this earth create a desire for God and heaven.
We are inundated with this lie in our culture. There is a quick fix for everything it seems. Worldly philosophy which tells us that every longing we have should be fulfilled. Satisfy your needs with a how-to book, a vacation, a new look, a "deep-dish pizza" as Nancy says or you know...some people might choose a bag of Doritos. Same idea. Same lie. Same bondage. These things we look to will never satisfy us. In fact, they will leave us feeling more empty in the end. We have been created with what some call a "God-sized hole in our hearts"...a longing that only He can fill.
What Lies do you struggle with about yourself? And, what Truth do you need to cling to to free yourself from that way of thinking?
I need to remember to look to the Lord to fulfill all my longings. I also need to remember that the opinions of others do not define my worth. I am not defined by my past or by the actions of others. I am worthy because I am His....I am loved perfectly and completely by the Lord. I need to guard my thoughts and search my motives. Remain in the word and in prayer daily.
This song by JJ Heller pretty much sums it up:
Praying for you this week...and appreciate your prayers for me as well. Please stick with this ladies. I would love to hear your thoughts on this week's topic. Next week, we will be covering Chapter Four: Lies Women Believe About Sin.
Love to all...
P.S. Scroll down to the post below for an exciting opportunity to be blessed and encouraged with the ladies of SGM at the Women of Faith Conference in Columbus, Ohio.
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Women of Faith Giveaway ~ So Excited I Cannot Even Deal
CONTEST CLOSED: WINNER ANNOUNCED
(MATTIE FROM BEAUTY WILL RISE)
Last year, we went to Women of Faith and had our socks thoroughly blessed off by all of the beautiful ladies who shared their hearts from the stage...and of course...ahem....Mary Beth and Stephen Curtis Chapman. I met Jennilee and had some delicious cheesecake with my Holly-girl. Becki and I shared some giggles and we all just had a grand time getting encouraged, praising the Lord, laughing, crying, being inspired, and just being girls.
This year....we are getting all our ducks in a row to go again. I haven't ordered our tickets yet, but I would like to within the next couple weeks. I wanted to give you an opportunity to order tickets in the Sufficient Grace group, so you can sit with us. That may not sound very exciting at first, but keep reading! You might decide you really want to sit with us.There will be more information about how you can order tickets in the Sufficient Grace group coming soon in a future post.
Now...for the exciting part....
This year, Women of Faith...
Is featuring....
A very special speaker.
She is a blogger, author, and mama....with a beautiful heart...a gift of writing that leaves you feeling as if God's love is whispered into every word she writes, and a smile that makes you feel like you're sitting on her back porch chatting with your best friend on a summer day.
She loves Beth Moore....but WE love HER!
People....I cannot contain myself....
It's...
Angie Smith from Bring the Rain!!!!!!!!
Angie will be speaking at the Women of Faith in Columbus (and other venues) this year!! And...she is willing to take a few minutes to meet with the ladies who will be attending the conference with Sufficient Grace. I am sooooo excited to meet her and to hopefully meet a few of you!
Holly from Caring for Carleigh, Becki, and I will be going and we really hope some of you will join us. You know, we have to spread the blessing around, right?
So....
Sufficient Grace Ministries would like to offer to give away at least one Women of Faith ticket to one of you. The ticket, valued at $99, will be good for the Women of Faith Conference in Columbus, Ohio April 29-April 30, 2011. It includes an all-day conference Friday and Saturday and lunch for both days. (You are responsible for covering your travel cost, additional meals, and accommodations. Contact me for information about booking accommodations. We may be able to get a group discount, and ladies can share a room to reduce cost.)
You can visit the Women of Faith website for more details about the amazing speakers, singers, and other guests who will be in Columbus. Also, contact me, if you decide to order tickets to sit with the Sufficient Grace group: sufficientgraceministries (at) gmail (dot) com.
How can you enter to win a Women of Faith ticket, to sit with the ladies from Sufficient Grace, and meet Angie?
There are several ways to enter:
First....leave a comment on this post. For fun, you could share a "woman of faith" in your life who has inspired you.
Additional entries for:
Facebooking or tweeting about this contest.
If you are a follower of this blog.
Follow Sufficient Grace on facebook.
*Please leave a separate comment on this post for each additional entry in order to make it easier for me to count.
I'm so excited! Praying (and trusting) this will be a blessing, and hoping some of you can join us!
Happy Sunday....and Go Jets and Packers!
(MATTIE FROM BEAUTY WILL RISE)
Last year, we went to Women of Faith and had our socks thoroughly blessed off by all of the beautiful ladies who shared their hearts from the stage...and of course...ahem....Mary Beth and Stephen Curtis Chapman. I met Jennilee and had some delicious cheesecake with my Holly-girl. Becki and I shared some giggles and we all just had a grand time getting encouraged, praising the Lord, laughing, crying, being inspired, and just being girls.
This year....we are getting all our ducks in a row to go again. I haven't ordered our tickets yet, but I would like to within the next couple weeks. I wanted to give you an opportunity to order tickets in the Sufficient Grace group, so you can sit with us. That may not sound very exciting at first, but keep reading! You might decide you really want to sit with us.There will be more information about how you can order tickets in the Sufficient Grace group coming soon in a future post.
Now...for the exciting part....
This year, Women of Faith...
Is featuring....
A very special speaker.
She is a blogger, author, and mama....with a beautiful heart...a gift of writing that leaves you feeling as if God's love is whispered into every word she writes, and a smile that makes you feel like you're sitting on her back porch chatting with your best friend on a summer day.
She loves Beth Moore....but WE love HER!
People....I cannot contain myself....
It's...
Angie Smith from Bring the Rain!!!!!!!!
Angie will be speaking at the Women of Faith in Columbus (and other venues) this year!! And...she is willing to take a few minutes to meet with the ladies who will be attending the conference with Sufficient Grace. I am sooooo excited to meet her and to hopefully meet a few of you!
Holly from Caring for Carleigh, Becki, and I will be going and we really hope some of you will join us. You know, we have to spread the blessing around, right?
So....
Sufficient Grace Ministries would like to offer to give away at least one Women of Faith ticket to one of you. The ticket, valued at $99, will be good for the Women of Faith Conference in Columbus, Ohio April 29-April 30, 2011. It includes an all-day conference Friday and Saturday and lunch for both days. (You are responsible for covering your travel cost, additional meals, and accommodations. Contact me for information about booking accommodations. We may be able to get a group discount, and ladies can share a room to reduce cost.)
You can visit the Women of Faith website for more details about the amazing speakers, singers, and other guests who will be in Columbus. Also, contact me, if you decide to order tickets to sit with the Sufficient Grace group: sufficientgraceministries (at) gmail (dot) com.
How can you enter to win a Women of Faith ticket, to sit with the ladies from Sufficient Grace, and meet Angie?
There are several ways to enter:
First....leave a comment on this post. For fun, you could share a "woman of faith" in your life who has inspired you.
Additional entries for:
Facebooking or tweeting about this contest.
If you are a follower of this blog.
Follow Sufficient Grace on facebook.
*Please leave a separate comment on this post for each additional entry in order to make it easier for me to count.
I'm so excited! Praying (and trusting) this will be a blessing, and hoping some of you can join us!
Happy Sunday....and Go Jets and Packers!
Friday, January 21, 2011
2:30 a.m....Awake Again
It's 2:30a.m. and I'm awake...again. It happens sometimes. I fall asleep around 11:00pm and at around 2:30a.m...here I am.
Wide awake...with no escape from all the burdens of this life, rushing through my mind.
Awake...with all the thoughts that we stuff somewhere else throughout the busyness of the day, finding it much easier to drown out the unpleasantness in the noise of life.
But, in the silence....they come...unbidden, unwelcome...pressing in with full force. I try to shake them off at first, just wanting to nestle further under the comfort of my covers and enjoy the bliss of sleep. Much needed, much desired, sleep. They press in with added fervor.
I begin to pray, taking great pains to lay them at the feet of Jesus, instead of dwelling in worry and hopelessness. It can be an effort beyond any other to resist worry...in the dark of night...when there is nothing else to distract from the barrage of burdens and accusations. Worries that I would never dream up during the day, suddenly surfacing, reminding me they must have been here all the time. They must be with me in the day, just waiting...bursting for release when I am helpless to fight them...or run to something else to keep from looking. They begin with concerns on my heart for my family or even just things that I need to remember to do...and wander to those of my friends. I keep praying, pressing on. It takes strength to turn worries to prayer in the dark of night when worries seem their strongest and I feel my weariest. Soon, I am burdened for the grieving hearts that belong to faces I've never seen, but mothers my own heart still feels so connected to...and the needs of Sufficient Grace. So, I pray some more. Next, come the parade of failures...accusations of all the ways I fall short...both currently and in the past. I writhe uncomfortably for a bit. Then, I pray some more.
Sometimes, I wonder...does the enemy just attack at night because I seem powerless to fight him? And, does God allow it, just because due to the sheer force of the attack and my complete helplessness in the dark of the night...I will run to Him, knowing at His feet is the only place where I will find relief. It won't be in the bag of Doritos or the can of Pepsi. Not at 2:30a.m. It won't be by chatting with a friend, exchanging snarky pleasantries with my boys, laughing with Tim, joking with students and co-workers at school, watching something mindless on TV, or running to and fro to get it all done. Relief won't be found in the arms of my husband as he snores peacefully beside me like a normal person, at 2:30a.m. It won't even be found as I pour myself into helping someone else. Or do the next thing on the list...whatever that may be.
His word tells us to be anxious for nothing...
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God... - Phil. 4:6
To keep our eyes on Him...
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
- Heb. 12:1-3
In the light of day, I take my eyes off my worries and try to keep from dwelling on what makes me anxious or fixating on my latest failure as a human being. The problem is, there's a difference from taking our eyes off the burdens of this life, looking to something that simply distracts us. Distraction is sort of a gift for one who spends her days at the mercy of busyness....which I think would describe most mothers in any season. There's a lot of places to focus our minds...too many places. There is a difference between just looking to something else...anything else...and keeping our eyes fixed on Jesus. There is a difference between just escaping to any old thing, and running to His arms for comfort.
Distraction I can do, but as His light shines in the darkness of my night, truth is revealed. The truth is, I'm doing way too much just looking away from what troubles my heart....and not nearly enough fixing my eyes on Him. Running from the burdens of this life...instead of running toward Him. Maybe, that's why I have to be awake at 2:30a.m., so I'm quiet enough to listen.
Praying that as the light dawns on this day, it will not chase away the truth He has whispered to my heart in the darkness of this night and so many others. (Also...part of the reason that I came here to share that truth with you...so I won't forget. Plus, I have an inkling I'm not alone in this struggle to "lay it all down". Which is why I will be saying some prayers for all of us awake at 2:30a.m., seeking sweet sleep and peace in His arms.)
Love to all...
Wide awake...with no escape from all the burdens of this life, rushing through my mind.
Awake...with all the thoughts that we stuff somewhere else throughout the busyness of the day, finding it much easier to drown out the unpleasantness in the noise of life.
But, in the silence....they come...unbidden, unwelcome...pressing in with full force. I try to shake them off at first, just wanting to nestle further under the comfort of my covers and enjoy the bliss of sleep. Much needed, much desired, sleep. They press in with added fervor.
I begin to pray, taking great pains to lay them at the feet of Jesus, instead of dwelling in worry and hopelessness. It can be an effort beyond any other to resist worry...in the dark of night...when there is nothing else to distract from the barrage of burdens and accusations. Worries that I would never dream up during the day, suddenly surfacing, reminding me they must have been here all the time. They must be with me in the day, just waiting...bursting for release when I am helpless to fight them...or run to something else to keep from looking. They begin with concerns on my heart for my family or even just things that I need to remember to do...and wander to those of my friends. I keep praying, pressing on. It takes strength to turn worries to prayer in the dark of night when worries seem their strongest and I feel my weariest. Soon, I am burdened for the grieving hearts that belong to faces I've never seen, but mothers my own heart still feels so connected to...and the needs of Sufficient Grace. So, I pray some more. Next, come the parade of failures...accusations of all the ways I fall short...both currently and in the past. I writhe uncomfortably for a bit. Then, I pray some more.
Sometimes, I wonder...does the enemy just attack at night because I seem powerless to fight him? And, does God allow it, just because due to the sheer force of the attack and my complete helplessness in the dark of the night...I will run to Him, knowing at His feet is the only place where I will find relief. It won't be in the bag of Doritos or the can of Pepsi. Not at 2:30a.m. It won't be by chatting with a friend, exchanging snarky pleasantries with my boys, laughing with Tim, joking with students and co-workers at school, watching something mindless on TV, or running to and fro to get it all done. Relief won't be found in the arms of my husband as he snores peacefully beside me like a normal person, at 2:30a.m. It won't even be found as I pour myself into helping someone else. Or do the next thing on the list...whatever that may be.
His word tells us to be anxious for nothing...
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God... - Phil. 4:6
To keep our eyes on Him...
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
- Heb. 12:1-3
In the light of day, I take my eyes off my worries and try to keep from dwelling on what makes me anxious or fixating on my latest failure as a human being. The problem is, there's a difference from taking our eyes off the burdens of this life, looking to something that simply distracts us. Distraction is sort of a gift for one who spends her days at the mercy of busyness....which I think would describe most mothers in any season. There's a lot of places to focus our minds...too many places. There is a difference between just looking to something else...anything else...and keeping our eyes fixed on Jesus. There is a difference between just escaping to any old thing, and running to His arms for comfort.
Distraction I can do, but as His light shines in the darkness of my night, truth is revealed. The truth is, I'm doing way too much just looking away from what troubles my heart....and not nearly enough fixing my eyes on Him. Running from the burdens of this life...instead of running toward Him. Maybe, that's why I have to be awake at 2:30a.m., so I'm quiet enough to listen.
Praying that as the light dawns on this day, it will not chase away the truth He has whispered to my heart in the darkness of this night and so many others. (Also...part of the reason that I came here to share that truth with you...so I won't forget. Plus, I have an inkling I'm not alone in this struggle to "lay it all down". Which is why I will be saying some prayers for all of us awake at 2:30a.m., seeking sweet sleep and peace in His arms.)
Love to all...
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Ripe With Possibility (This post includes the Two Hour Delay Song for Your Listening...ahem...Pleasure)
This morning I woke up to the glorious news of a two hour delay due to icy roads. A two hour delay...sigh...one of life's gifts for children and mommies and teachers/faculty alike. You may not know this about us. But, whenever there is a two hour delay at the Gerken house, James and I dance and jump on the bed and sing the two hour delay song.
It goes something like this:
Two hour delay...two hour delay...two hour, two hour, two hour delay....HEY!
A two hour delay means I can sleep a little longer, linger a bit more, and sip my tea a little slower. As opposed to rushing around like a mad woman and grabbing my tea on our way out the door to get James and I to school and to my job as a special needs para, as I shout to Timothy to drive safely and have a good day. Husband Tim leaves for work before we are up, so he sometimes gets a groaned, muffled..."Love you...see ya". Real life isn't very romantic...but after almost seventeen years...I like real life way better, anyway. I would so rather laugh with that man, while nestled under the covers in my sweatpants than do almost anything else. But, that's another post.
A two hour delay also brings with it the possibility of the ever coveted, NO SCHOOL TODAY! We wait with baited breath for the words to scroll across the screen. No longer simply satisfied with the extra two hours, we long for more.
And, that, my friends, was the gift we received on this glorious ice covered Ohio morning. So, in sweet celebration of this delightful gift of a day ripe with all the possibilities a free day can hold, I give you our demonstrations of the Two Hour Delay Song and No School Today Song....performed live from my bedroom in our morning clothes and no make up...for the sake of authenticity...where I may or may not spend most of the day. Today, I just might work on my book (the one I've been writing for several years) from the comfort of my bed, organize a corner of my basement, call a friend, definitely will sip some tea, read some blogs, study my bible, read some of the Lies Women Believe book, maybe work on some Sufficient Grace shipments, pray some prayers, perfect my moves on Just Dance 2, giggle with my people, and soak in the sweet gift of right now. Oh...the possibilities.
By the way...I'm wearing my Bernie Kosar jersey, even though you can't tell in the video. My morning clothes are fancy like that! ;) The season is over for the Browns...but, there's always next year! (The sad motto of Browns fans!) And....I'm now rooting for the Jets to go to the Super Bowl, because I love their trash-talkin' coach.
I hope you are enjoying the gift of right now, as well...and all the possibilities this day holds.
Oh...a couple other things...
Our son, Timothy turns seventeen this week! Happy Birthday, Timothy! (Which means I have been a mama for seventeen years...wow!) And we are making Comfort Bears for Sufficient Grace this Saturday morning at 8:30 a.m. at Harvest Fellowship Church. If you're local, come on out and help us stuff some bears!
Monday, January 17, 2011
Chapter Two ~ Lies Women Believe...About God
This week, we are covering Chapter Two from the book, Lies Women Believe and the Truth That Sets Them Free by Nancy Leigh DeMoss.
This chapter begins at the heart of the matter. What we believe about God...what we truly believe...not what we think we believe or what we say we believe...impacts how we react to everything in our lives. Realizing Who God truly is puts all the other things we may face in this life in perspective. This chapter begins with Eve, questioning what she believed about God. Like many of us, when life grows difficult and the consequences of sin start sinking in, Eve starts to doubt. There are several points that convicted me at the beginning of the chapter.
Here are a few:
1. Satan knows where you are most vulnerable to being deceived, and that is where he will target his attack.
Our enemy knows us. He knows us well. And, He strikes where we are weak. Unfortunately, we're not that complicated.
2. ...women who claim to believe the Truth of God's Word; but the way they live-their choices, their priorities, their response to pain- reveals that they do not really believe the Truth. However what we believe is revealed, not by what we know or what we say we believe, but by how we actually live. So as we walk through these lies, it's not enough to ask, "Do I believe this lie?" Each of us must also ask, "Do I live as though I believe this lie?"
Yikes! I have been guilty of this more times than I'd like to admit. I know the truth. I say I believe it. There have been times when life gets hard, that I have lived like I believe it. But...there have been other times, when I reacted to circumstances instead...times when I gave into feelings, instead of trusting what I know...times when I looked too closely at the size of the giant in front of me, instead of remembering the size of my God. Too many times.
3. Nancy writes, "I have chosen to start by dealing with lies that women believe about God because there is nothing more crucial than what we believe about God."
Let's look at Lie #1....
"God is Not Really Good. If He Were, He Would..."
It's hard to even type those words. Of course, we believe that God is good, right? I mean, from the time we are very young, we pray that God is good. It's one of the basic concepts of our faith.
Many of you have walked in the places that drive one to question God's goodness. I have witnessed the reaction in others, while mothers stand over the graves of their children, while watching tragedies in the lives of others, trying to understand a natural disaster or an act of terror. I've even, in the recesses of my heart, allowed a flicker of wondering about this very question exist as I watched my mother's terrible suffering at the end of her life. Just for a moment, it lingered.
You've heard people ask the question, "How could a good God allow this to happen?"
Nancy writes, "When turbulence, disappointment, or pain comes into our lives; when we lose people we love; when things don't go as we had hoped or planned, Satan tempts us to wonder, 'Is God really good? If He were, how could He have let this happen?' or 'Why would He have kept this good thing from me?'
I have been tempted by Satan in this area....meaning, He has dangled the question in front of me. In moments when I grow weary with the overwhelming amount of suffering that exists. But, each time, God reminds me gently and lovingly of all that He has done. And, I rest in His goodness. All lies must be combatted...taken captive...by the truth. And, the truth is: God is good, and everything He does is good. (Psalm 119:68)
The truth is: We live in a fallen world, where sin reigns...where death and disease, brokenness, illness, suffering, and sorrow exist in abundance. We live in this world, not because it was the will of our loving, good God...but because of our choice to bring sin into the perfect paradise He created for us. We have hope and redemption through Jesus, because He died for our sins and rose again. But, that doesn't take away the current predicament of living here, in the consequences of a world full of sin. Our time here is guaranteed to have some struggles. God never promised otherwise. He said not to be surprised at the trials, but to expect them.
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28
Lie # 2: God Doesn't Love Me
Again, most of us wouldn't say this. Of course, God loves us. "Jesus loves me...This I know", right?
Nancy writes, "But for many women, there is a disconnection between what they know intellectually and what they feel to be true. And therein lies one of our problems: We trust what we feel to be true, rather than what we know to be true." Nancy talks about this being fundamental to the way women are wired. And, it truly is an issue for us...trusting our feelings instead of trusting in what we know.
We must remember, that God loves us...not because of who we are or what we have done. He loves us, because of who He is. And...nothing can change that love.
Loved this quote from Melana, who battled breast cancer: As His bride, we are also eaten up with cancer - sin- and are scarred, mutilated, and ugly, but He loves us because that is who He is.
It's not about what we do or don't do...whether we are deserving of His love. We aren't, but He loves us anyway.
Lie # 3 ~ God is Just Like My Father
This one stops me in my tracks, and brushes up against the most tender places of my heart. Nancy begins by saying, "As women, our view of God is often greatly influenced by the men we have known - particularly our fathers." It is a bit frightening to be as vulnerable as I'm about to be with you. In the darkest moments of my life, Satan has been there to whisper, "Where is your God, now?" I resist that lie, of course, but there is a reason that's the one He chooses. It's the fear of being forsaken...left...abandoned...rejected. I believe that God is good, and that He loves me. But, there is a weak spot for me...in the dark moments...when I'm told my baby is incompatible with life, when I'm standing beside the grave of my daughters on a cold November day, when my marriage was rocky for a season, when my mother...the one constant in my life, since I was born...slowly slipped away from this earth before my eyes. I don't have to embrace that lie. I can resist it, battle it with truth. And, I do...every time. But, there is a reason Satan keeps using it. He knows it's the most effective one for me. He knows, it's the one that just might put a chink in my armor.
Nancy's words are so true, "You must believe me when I tell you that God is not like any man you have ever known."
"The God of the bible is a compassionate, tender, merciful Father."
In Hebrews, He promises: I will never leave you, nor forsake you.
Nancy's words: ...the Father loves us as He loves His Son. If we believed this, could we ever have an anxious or rebellious thought again? Would we not believe in every conceivable circumstance that the divine Father would care for us in the best possible way and meet our every need?
We can't stop Satan from questioning us...from tempting us to believe His lies...from using the places we have been hurt and weakened. We can't always stop ourselves from wondering if His promises are for other people, but not for us. But, we can control how we react to the lies presented to us. We can fight the lies with the truth.
Lie #4 ~ God is Not Really Enough
This is a big one. This lie tells us that God is not enough...that His word is not sufficient. We need God's word... plus tapes, books, conferences. We need God plus close friends, good health, a good job, children, a husband, a house with all the modern conveniences....etc.
This is the lie that causes us to look for comfort and fulfillment in the things of this world. I have shared that it's an issue for me, for sure. Any time we indulge in the things of this world to make ourselves feel better, we are believing this lie. The woman in the example shared that she went to food for comfort. It doesn't have to be food....there are many earthly things we look to for comfort and fulfillment when life gets tough. What are some of your pluses you go to instead of believing God is enough?
We must remember the truth, as God reminds us in His word...He is all we need. (Col. 2:9-10)
Lie # 5 ~ God's Ways are Too Restrictive
Obedience is a pathway to freedom. Is that how we see it? Do we understand that true freedom comes, not in doing whatever we want with disregard to the consequences but in obeying God's plan for our lives? Do we realize the bondage that entangles us when we indulge ourselves by doing it our way? Do we understand that the restrictions God sets are for our good....they are lovingly placed there to protect us and keep us from the bondage of sin?
The woman in the story shares that she ate what she wanted and felt punished when she tried to restrain herself or deny herself. It doesn't have to be food. There are many ways to indulge our flesh. Food is definitely one that I can relate to, but it may be something different for you.
Lie # 6 ~ God Should Fix My Problems
God didn't promise us a perfect life. In fact, quite the opposite. He tells us to expect trials and tribulations. His only promise is to never leave us or forsake us...to carry us and comfort us...through those times as we cling to Him. But, that's not the way the world we live in thinks, is it? We have immediate solutions to all our problems...or at least we think we should. God does not exist simply to solve our every problem. He is not a Santa Claus, if you will. And, sometimes, there is a reason that a problem exists. It could be to work in our lives or the lives of those we love for good. It could be to draw us to Him. It could be that we have to walk through that trial in order to comfort someone else one day. Who knows? Our ways...our understanding are not His ways.
God never promised us a perfect life, free from struggles. In fact, when Paul cried out to Him to remove His thorn in the flesh, God responded in 2 Corinth. 12:9 that His grace was sufficient. He wasn't going to take the problem, but He would Paul the grace to endure it.
--------------
There is so much to share this week, so many truths to delve into to combat the lies. I hope you are reading along with us, even if we don't hear from you. This book is such a wonderful guide in combating the lies bombarding us with the Truth from God's word. There are many more scriptures listed in Nancy's book that I didn't list here. His Word is the most powerful weapon in battling the lies we struggle with. I will be leaving the linky off, but feel free to leave your thoughts in the comment section or the Blog Frog Discussion.
Next week, we will be covering Chapter 3: Lies Women Believe About Themselves.
This chapter begins at the heart of the matter. What we believe about God...what we truly believe...not what we think we believe or what we say we believe...impacts how we react to everything in our lives. Realizing Who God truly is puts all the other things we may face in this life in perspective. This chapter begins with Eve, questioning what she believed about God. Like many of us, when life grows difficult and the consequences of sin start sinking in, Eve starts to doubt. There are several points that convicted me at the beginning of the chapter.
Here are a few:
1. Satan knows where you are most vulnerable to being deceived, and that is where he will target his attack.
Our enemy knows us. He knows us well. And, He strikes where we are weak. Unfortunately, we're not that complicated.
2. ...women who claim to believe the Truth of God's Word; but the way they live-their choices, their priorities, their response to pain- reveals that they do not really believe the Truth. However what we believe is revealed, not by what we know or what we say we believe, but by how we actually live. So as we walk through these lies, it's not enough to ask, "Do I believe this lie?" Each of us must also ask, "Do I live as though I believe this lie?"
Yikes! I have been guilty of this more times than I'd like to admit. I know the truth. I say I believe it. There have been times when life gets hard, that I have lived like I believe it. But...there have been other times, when I reacted to circumstances instead...times when I gave into feelings, instead of trusting what I know...times when I looked too closely at the size of the giant in front of me, instead of remembering the size of my God. Too many times.
3. Nancy writes, "I have chosen to start by dealing with lies that women believe about God because there is nothing more crucial than what we believe about God."
Let's look at Lie #1....
"God is Not Really Good. If He Were, He Would..."
It's hard to even type those words. Of course, we believe that God is good, right? I mean, from the time we are very young, we pray that God is good. It's one of the basic concepts of our faith.
Many of you have walked in the places that drive one to question God's goodness. I have witnessed the reaction in others, while mothers stand over the graves of their children, while watching tragedies in the lives of others, trying to understand a natural disaster or an act of terror. I've even, in the recesses of my heart, allowed a flicker of wondering about this very question exist as I watched my mother's terrible suffering at the end of her life. Just for a moment, it lingered.
You've heard people ask the question, "How could a good God allow this to happen?"
Nancy writes, "When turbulence, disappointment, or pain comes into our lives; when we lose people we love; when things don't go as we had hoped or planned, Satan tempts us to wonder, 'Is God really good? If He were, how could He have let this happen?' or 'Why would He have kept this good thing from me?'
I have been tempted by Satan in this area....meaning, He has dangled the question in front of me. In moments when I grow weary with the overwhelming amount of suffering that exists. But, each time, God reminds me gently and lovingly of all that He has done. And, I rest in His goodness. All lies must be combatted...taken captive...by the truth. And, the truth is: God is good, and everything He does is good. (Psalm 119:68)
The truth is: We live in a fallen world, where sin reigns...where death and disease, brokenness, illness, suffering, and sorrow exist in abundance. We live in this world, not because it was the will of our loving, good God...but because of our choice to bring sin into the perfect paradise He created for us. We have hope and redemption through Jesus, because He died for our sins and rose again. But, that doesn't take away the current predicament of living here, in the consequences of a world full of sin. Our time here is guaranteed to have some struggles. God never promised otherwise. He said not to be surprised at the trials, but to expect them.
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28
Lie # 2: God Doesn't Love Me
Again, most of us wouldn't say this. Of course, God loves us. "Jesus loves me...This I know", right?
Nancy writes, "But for many women, there is a disconnection between what they know intellectually and what they feel to be true. And therein lies one of our problems: We trust what we feel to be true, rather than what we know to be true." Nancy talks about this being fundamental to the way women are wired. And, it truly is an issue for us...trusting our feelings instead of trusting in what we know.
We must remember, that God loves us...not because of who we are or what we have done. He loves us, because of who He is. And...nothing can change that love.
Loved this quote from Melana, who battled breast cancer: As His bride, we are also eaten up with cancer - sin- and are scarred, mutilated, and ugly, but He loves us because that is who He is.
It's not about what we do or don't do...whether we are deserving of His love. We aren't, but He loves us anyway.
Lie # 3 ~ God is Just Like My Father
This one stops me in my tracks, and brushes up against the most tender places of my heart. Nancy begins by saying, "As women, our view of God is often greatly influenced by the men we have known - particularly our fathers." It is a bit frightening to be as vulnerable as I'm about to be with you. In the darkest moments of my life, Satan has been there to whisper, "Where is your God, now?" I resist that lie, of course, but there is a reason that's the one He chooses. It's the fear of being forsaken...left...abandoned...rejected. I believe that God is good, and that He loves me. But, there is a weak spot for me...in the dark moments...when I'm told my baby is incompatible with life, when I'm standing beside the grave of my daughters on a cold November day, when my marriage was rocky for a season, when my mother...the one constant in my life, since I was born...slowly slipped away from this earth before my eyes. I don't have to embrace that lie. I can resist it, battle it with truth. And, I do...every time. But, there is a reason Satan keeps using it. He knows it's the most effective one for me. He knows, it's the one that just might put a chink in my armor.
Nancy's words are so true, "You must believe me when I tell you that God is not like any man you have ever known."
"The God of the bible is a compassionate, tender, merciful Father."
In Hebrews, He promises: I will never leave you, nor forsake you.
Nancy's words: ...the Father loves us as He loves His Son. If we believed this, could we ever have an anxious or rebellious thought again? Would we not believe in every conceivable circumstance that the divine Father would care for us in the best possible way and meet our every need?
We can't stop Satan from questioning us...from tempting us to believe His lies...from using the places we have been hurt and weakened. We can't always stop ourselves from wondering if His promises are for other people, but not for us. But, we can control how we react to the lies presented to us. We can fight the lies with the truth.
Lie #4 ~ God is Not Really Enough
This is a big one. This lie tells us that God is not enough...that His word is not sufficient. We need God's word... plus tapes, books, conferences. We need God plus close friends, good health, a good job, children, a husband, a house with all the modern conveniences....etc.
This is the lie that causes us to look for comfort and fulfillment in the things of this world. I have shared that it's an issue for me, for sure. Any time we indulge in the things of this world to make ourselves feel better, we are believing this lie. The woman in the example shared that she went to food for comfort. It doesn't have to be food....there are many earthly things we look to for comfort and fulfillment when life gets tough. What are some of your pluses you go to instead of believing God is enough?
We must remember the truth, as God reminds us in His word...He is all we need. (Col. 2:9-10)
Lie # 5 ~ God's Ways are Too Restrictive
Obedience is a pathway to freedom. Is that how we see it? Do we understand that true freedom comes, not in doing whatever we want with disregard to the consequences but in obeying God's plan for our lives? Do we realize the bondage that entangles us when we indulge ourselves by doing it our way? Do we understand that the restrictions God sets are for our good....they are lovingly placed there to protect us and keep us from the bondage of sin?
The woman in the story shares that she ate what she wanted and felt punished when she tried to restrain herself or deny herself. It doesn't have to be food. There are many ways to indulge our flesh. Food is definitely one that I can relate to, but it may be something different for you.
Lie # 6 ~ God Should Fix My Problems
God didn't promise us a perfect life. In fact, quite the opposite. He tells us to expect trials and tribulations. His only promise is to never leave us or forsake us...to carry us and comfort us...through those times as we cling to Him. But, that's not the way the world we live in thinks, is it? We have immediate solutions to all our problems...or at least we think we should. God does not exist simply to solve our every problem. He is not a Santa Claus, if you will. And, sometimes, there is a reason that a problem exists. It could be to work in our lives or the lives of those we love for good. It could be to draw us to Him. It could be that we have to walk through that trial in order to comfort someone else one day. Who knows? Our ways...our understanding are not His ways.
God never promised us a perfect life, free from struggles. In fact, when Paul cried out to Him to remove His thorn in the flesh, God responded in 2 Corinth. 12:9 that His grace was sufficient. He wasn't going to take the problem, but He would Paul the grace to endure it.
--------------
There is so much to share this week, so many truths to delve into to combat the lies. I hope you are reading along with us, even if we don't hear from you. This book is such a wonderful guide in combating the lies bombarding us with the Truth from God's word. There are many more scriptures listed in Nancy's book that I didn't list here. His Word is the most powerful weapon in battling the lies we struggle with. I will be leaving the linky off, but feel free to leave your thoughts in the comment section or the Blog Frog Discussion.
Next week, we will be covering Chapter 3: Lies Women Believe About Themselves.
Monday, January 10, 2011
Lies and Truth Study Chapter One: Truth or Consequences
Each Monday over the next several weeks, we will be doing a bible study based on the book Lies Women Believe and the Truth that Sets Them Free, by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. There are several ways you can join in with us. First, get a book so that you can read along! You can then join in with us in a number of ways: For those who wish to do a post on their blog and link up, we will provide a linky at the bottom of this post. If you wish to just share your heart in the comments, that's fine, too. I will also start a Blog Frog discussion on the right sidebar if you wish to delve in further there.
*If you still wish to join and don't yet have the book, please leave a comment on this post stating you would like a copy of Lies Women Believe... . I have ordered three extra copies for those who need one.
--------------------------------------------
This week, we are covering Chapter One: Truth or Consequences
Lies and deception. We find them everywhere we look. I pondered those thoughts as I read some of the examples in this week's chapter. I read each lie about getting a quick fix, satisfying our cravings, losing weight fast, etc. and the truth rang out. So much in our world, in the culture, and media looks good and desirable...and we think we can have it, deserve to have it...right now. As Nancy says..."with no sweat, no discipline, no cost, no effort, no pain". As I indulge in eating unhealthy foods and linger on my couch after just a few days of enthusiasm for the idea of a "healthy new me" in 2011, I am convicted by this truth. We have been deceived to think that we can have what we want...quick and easy. And, when it doesn't work out that way, I often give up.
How does this happen...and why?
It began in a garden...with a man named Adam and a woman named Eve. They lived in the paradise God created for them, eating of the fruit and walking with the God who loved them. Until a Serpent came...with a lie. He presented it to Eve, because she was more easily deceived. We can try and argue the point if we wish, but the argument is futile. Eve, as a woman, was more vulnerable to deception. And, we as women today, face the same battle. It is wiser to recognize the struggle in order to overcome it...than to try to deny it's existence.
Eve saw that is was good...desirable for food...she took it and ate it.
As pointed out in Nancy's book, there are four steps to believing and acting on a lie:
Eve listened to the Serpent's lies.
She dwelled on the lies...growing careless with God's word...mulling over Satan's twisted interpretation.
Soon, she began to believe the lie...thinking Satan was right. She wanted to know what God knew...to be like Him. She thought she should be able to eat any fruit, as Satan suggested. She wouldn't die, after all, right? It sounded good...looked good...became desirable. And, she succumbed.
Finally...Eve acted on the desire planted by Satan, and ate the forbidden fruit.
How does this apply to us and how can it help us be less easily deceived?
Number one, it's important to know our enemy. Satan uses the same tactics with us that he did thousands of years ago in the garden, with Eve. Why would he change when it works so well?
Satan promises the best, but pays with the worst; he promises honor, but pays with disgrace; he promises pleasure, but pays with pain; he promises profit, but pays with loss; he promises life, but pays with death.
- Puritan Pastor, Thomas Brooks
He is the liar of all liars...the Father of lies (John 8:44), but he parades himself as an angel of light (2 Corinth. 11:4). That's the thing. We all agree that Satan is a liar...that he came to steal, kill, and destroy. If he stood before us all ugly and hideous spewing his hatred and evil schemes, we would resist and flee...wanting no part of it. But, he doesn't do that. He is wily and scheming...planting seeds of doubt subtly in our hearts, making sin look good and desirable, distracting us from true consequences, twisting God's word. It isn't even just the sparkling glitz and glamour of the world that Satan uses to deceive us. He may come as someone we trust...slipping in when our guard is down. Even from a well-meaning Christian friend or book. He may come from the television...perfect, together-looking people sharing ideas that seem good. He may come in the form of a quick fix, a financial success scheme, a new weight-loss plan, a big sale at our favorite store, a promotion that comes with a small price.
How can we discern the lies from the truth when they are so integrated into our lives? The answer is as simple, but not always easy to remember in the moment when we are swept into the seduction of the lie. The key is to combat Satan's lies with something more powerful...the Truth of God's word. We must measure every idea against God's word. If it doesn't fit, it's not the truth.
Nancy outlines three steps to moving from spiritual bondage to freedom:
1. Identify the areas of bondage or sinful behavior in our lives.
2. Identify the lies at the root of the bondage or behavior.
3. Replace the lies with the truth.
I love the simplicity of that plan, although I'm doubting that it will be that simple. You see, our enemy doesn't want us to have freedom in the areas where we have suffered bondage. He wants to keep us striving, distracted, tangled up, hopeless, useless. If one lie stops working, he will try another. So, as I've shared before, it's imperative that we pray for one another as we seek freedom in the areas where we are weak. The only thing that defeats the lies....is the Truth. We need God's word daily.
That brings me to my own confession time. I don't plan to share every sordid detail of all of my sins here for all of the Internet to view. But, I will share some of my struggles...for the purpose of this study and to ask for your prayers. And, I hope you will share yours, as well.
1. An obvious lie I have fallen prey to has to do with food. I've shared before that I struggle with overeating...leaning on food for comfort, as a reward, a stress reliever. I like food...a lot. My one friend calls food her back-stabbing best friend. You could also call it a frenemy, I suppose! Like other lies, it's presented as something that will feel good..."just eat the Doritos and you will feel better". And, I do...for a little while. Until I look in the mirror and notice the extra pounds and weariness. "You deserve to indulge in eating out...it's been a rough week." It feels good at the time, until I consider that I've once again filled my body with unhealthy food and spent money not in the budget...to feel better. That feeling goes away, and I am left with defeat, sorrow, failure, etc. (Please don't take this wrong. It's not wrong to go out to eat with a friend once in awhile or even have a yummy snack. Doritos certainly aren't the root of all evil! But, for me...it is a struggle. I often go to food, instead of going to God and His word for comfort and encouragement when things are tough. I curl up and nestle in beneath my own created layers of comfort. Food is just one of those layers. The result is a sluggish, unhealthy body and a discouraged, weary spirit. The result is bondage to the very thing Satan has dangled in front of me with promises of quick comfort and the reward of feeling good. An easy answer to the reality that people suffer and die from cancer...that mother's bury their babies...that there doesn't seem to be enough time in the day to accomplish the demands before me: work, home, family, ministry. Obviously, I can't solve those problems and hurts...can't make them go away. Food becomes a moment of comfort and distraction from all the stuff I can't fix. The truth is that my God is able to comfort and carry me through the painful things we face in this life. And, if I put things in proper order of priority, there IS enough time to accomplish what's before me. God will and does equip me. But, when I just throw my hands in the air and eat a Ho-Ho...I miss that victory.Please note: It isn't about food. We have to eat, after all. It's my attitude about food that's a problem. My struggles may not be the same as yours.)
2. Speaking of time...that's another thing I struggle with. Balancing the amount of time I spend working on the ministry and my other job working with special needs children, with the time I spend caring for my home and family.
3. Another lie I have fallen prey to is that since I am so busy...I sometimes don't have time to spend in God's word and in prayer...you know, other than the quick prayers I throw up throughout the day. I believe we will get to this later in the study...and the Truth reminds us...we don't have time NOT to pray and bathe ourselves in His word! Makes me shudder to think of the times that I have gone out without my armor on...thinking I could do the battles of the day on my own. Grateful for His grace...that He often covered me anyway.
There are more...and we will have to opportunity to delve further into the areas we are deceived in the coming weeks. Next week, we will talk about the Lies Women Believe about God. I am really excited about this one because I think that a true understanding of who God is brings so much power and truth to dispel the lies and puts every other struggle in life in perspective. When we measure the battles before us against the size of our God, everything else pales in comparison. Plus, I remember the first time I participated in this study, I was amazed to find how my view of who God is clouded the truth of who He really is...and led to areas of deception and bondage.
I am using the Companion Guide to the Lies...book, and will break down the study for next week below if you wish to break it down into daily increments. (If it's easier for you to just read the next chapter and reflect on it, that's fine too. We are all about grace. This is just an option.):
Day One: God is Good
Read pgs. 45-49
Additional verses to read if you wish - Ephesians 1:3-14 (consider the blessings), Psalm 34:8 and 106:1 (responding to His goodness), Romans 8:28-39 (providing perspective on God's goodness in painful and difficult situations)
Consider a situation when you may have been tempted to question God's goodness.
Praise Him for His goodness no matter what your circumstances.
Day Two: God is Loving
Read pages 50-54
Additional scripture about God's love for us:
John 15:13, John 3:16, Romans 5:8, 1 John 4:7-10
How can we reconcile the reality and truth of God's love for us with what we feel?
Personalize Paul's prayer for yourself in Ephesians 3:14-19
Day Three: God is Enough
Read pages 54-55
Consider the messages we find in our culture telling us what we need to be "truly fulfilled, happy, and complete".
Scripture:
Colossians 2:9-10 What does it mean to experience "fullness" and "completeness" in Christ?
Do we really believe that when we have God, we have enough. What pluses to we add on, thinking we also need those to be happy? How can we wean ourselves from the earthly, temporal things to the spiritual eternal ones?
Psalm 73:23-26 (pray these verses for yourself)
Day Four: The Law of Liberty
Read pages 55-56
Consider how God's laws are beneficial and how obedience can be a blessing.
Additional scripture:
Deut. 6:24-25
James 1:19-27
Day Five: Divine Delays and Denials
Read pages 56-58
Consider how society offers "quick fixes" to our problems. Are you facing or have you faced a trial you've asked God to remove, and He has not? How is God working through that trial in your life?
Scripture to ponder:
2 Corinthians 12:7-10
Job 23:10
Romans 5:3-4
James 1:2-4
Consider some of the lies we sometimes believe about God and the truth of who He really is. Which ones have you struggled with?
----------------
Even if you're not reading the book, and something rings true for you in these posts, we would love to hear your input. Please refer to the comments section of this post, and to the Blog Frog Discussion. I would love to hear your thoughts and struggles...and prayer requests. If you wish to post on your blog, there is also a linky below.
*If you still wish to join and don't yet have the book, please leave a comment on this post stating you would like a copy of Lies Women Believe... . I have ordered three extra copies for those who need one.
--------------------------------------------
This week, we are covering Chapter One: Truth or Consequences
Lies and deception. We find them everywhere we look. I pondered those thoughts as I read some of the examples in this week's chapter. I read each lie about getting a quick fix, satisfying our cravings, losing weight fast, etc. and the truth rang out. So much in our world, in the culture, and media looks good and desirable...and we think we can have it, deserve to have it...right now. As Nancy says..."with no sweat, no discipline, no cost, no effort, no pain". As I indulge in eating unhealthy foods and linger on my couch after just a few days of enthusiasm for the idea of a "healthy new me" in 2011, I am convicted by this truth. We have been deceived to think that we can have what we want...quick and easy. And, when it doesn't work out that way, I often give up.
How does this happen...and why?
It began in a garden...with a man named Adam and a woman named Eve. They lived in the paradise God created for them, eating of the fruit and walking with the God who loved them. Until a Serpent came...with a lie. He presented it to Eve, because she was more easily deceived. We can try and argue the point if we wish, but the argument is futile. Eve, as a woman, was more vulnerable to deception. And, we as women today, face the same battle. It is wiser to recognize the struggle in order to overcome it...than to try to deny it's existence.
Eve saw that is was good...desirable for food...she took it and ate it.
As pointed out in Nancy's book, there are four steps to believing and acting on a lie:
Eve listened to the Serpent's lies.
She dwelled on the lies...growing careless with God's word...mulling over Satan's twisted interpretation.
Soon, she began to believe the lie...thinking Satan was right. She wanted to know what God knew...to be like Him. She thought she should be able to eat any fruit, as Satan suggested. She wouldn't die, after all, right? It sounded good...looked good...became desirable. And, she succumbed.
Finally...Eve acted on the desire planted by Satan, and ate the forbidden fruit.
How does this apply to us and how can it help us be less easily deceived?
Number one, it's important to know our enemy. Satan uses the same tactics with us that he did thousands of years ago in the garden, with Eve. Why would he change when it works so well?
Satan promises the best, but pays with the worst; he promises honor, but pays with disgrace; he promises pleasure, but pays with pain; he promises profit, but pays with loss; he promises life, but pays with death.
- Puritan Pastor, Thomas Brooks
He is the liar of all liars...the Father of lies (John 8:44), but he parades himself as an angel of light (2 Corinth. 11:4). That's the thing. We all agree that Satan is a liar...that he came to steal, kill, and destroy. If he stood before us all ugly and hideous spewing his hatred and evil schemes, we would resist and flee...wanting no part of it. But, he doesn't do that. He is wily and scheming...planting seeds of doubt subtly in our hearts, making sin look good and desirable, distracting us from true consequences, twisting God's word. It isn't even just the sparkling glitz and glamour of the world that Satan uses to deceive us. He may come as someone we trust...slipping in when our guard is down. Even from a well-meaning Christian friend or book. He may come from the television...perfect, together-looking people sharing ideas that seem good. He may come in the form of a quick fix, a financial success scheme, a new weight-loss plan, a big sale at our favorite store, a promotion that comes with a small price.
How can we discern the lies from the truth when they are so integrated into our lives? The answer is as simple, but not always easy to remember in the moment when we are swept into the seduction of the lie. The key is to combat Satan's lies with something more powerful...the Truth of God's word. We must measure every idea against God's word. If it doesn't fit, it's not the truth.
Nancy outlines three steps to moving from spiritual bondage to freedom:
1. Identify the areas of bondage or sinful behavior in our lives.
2. Identify the lies at the root of the bondage or behavior.
3. Replace the lies with the truth.
I love the simplicity of that plan, although I'm doubting that it will be that simple. You see, our enemy doesn't want us to have freedom in the areas where we have suffered bondage. He wants to keep us striving, distracted, tangled up, hopeless, useless. If one lie stops working, he will try another. So, as I've shared before, it's imperative that we pray for one another as we seek freedom in the areas where we are weak. The only thing that defeats the lies....is the Truth. We need God's word daily.
That brings me to my own confession time. I don't plan to share every sordid detail of all of my sins here for all of the Internet to view. But, I will share some of my struggles...for the purpose of this study and to ask for your prayers. And, I hope you will share yours, as well.
1. An obvious lie I have fallen prey to has to do with food. I've shared before that I struggle with overeating...leaning on food for comfort, as a reward, a stress reliever. I like food...a lot. My one friend calls food her back-stabbing best friend. You could also call it a frenemy, I suppose! Like other lies, it's presented as something that will feel good..."just eat the Doritos and you will feel better". And, I do...for a little while. Until I look in the mirror and notice the extra pounds and weariness. "You deserve to indulge in eating out...it's been a rough week." It feels good at the time, until I consider that I've once again filled my body with unhealthy food and spent money not in the budget...to feel better. That feeling goes away, and I am left with defeat, sorrow, failure, etc. (Please don't take this wrong. It's not wrong to go out to eat with a friend once in awhile or even have a yummy snack. Doritos certainly aren't the root of all evil! But, for me...it is a struggle. I often go to food, instead of going to God and His word for comfort and encouragement when things are tough. I curl up and nestle in beneath my own created layers of comfort. Food is just one of those layers. The result is a sluggish, unhealthy body and a discouraged, weary spirit. The result is bondage to the very thing Satan has dangled in front of me with promises of quick comfort and the reward of feeling good. An easy answer to the reality that people suffer and die from cancer...that mother's bury their babies...that there doesn't seem to be enough time in the day to accomplish the demands before me: work, home, family, ministry. Obviously, I can't solve those problems and hurts...can't make them go away. Food becomes a moment of comfort and distraction from all the stuff I can't fix. The truth is that my God is able to comfort and carry me through the painful things we face in this life. And, if I put things in proper order of priority, there IS enough time to accomplish what's before me. God will and does equip me. But, when I just throw my hands in the air and eat a Ho-Ho...I miss that victory.Please note: It isn't about food. We have to eat, after all. It's my attitude about food that's a problem. My struggles may not be the same as yours.)
2. Speaking of time...that's another thing I struggle with. Balancing the amount of time I spend working on the ministry and my other job working with special needs children, with the time I spend caring for my home and family.
3. Another lie I have fallen prey to is that since I am so busy...I sometimes don't have time to spend in God's word and in prayer...you know, other than the quick prayers I throw up throughout the day. I believe we will get to this later in the study...and the Truth reminds us...we don't have time NOT to pray and bathe ourselves in His word! Makes me shudder to think of the times that I have gone out without my armor on...thinking I could do the battles of the day on my own. Grateful for His grace...that He often covered me anyway.
There are more...and we will have to opportunity to delve further into the areas we are deceived in the coming weeks. Next week, we will talk about the Lies Women Believe about God. I am really excited about this one because I think that a true understanding of who God is brings so much power and truth to dispel the lies and puts every other struggle in life in perspective. When we measure the battles before us against the size of our God, everything else pales in comparison. Plus, I remember the first time I participated in this study, I was amazed to find how my view of who God is clouded the truth of who He really is...and led to areas of deception and bondage.
I am using the Companion Guide to the Lies...book, and will break down the study for next week below if you wish to break it down into daily increments. (If it's easier for you to just read the next chapter and reflect on it, that's fine too. We are all about grace. This is just an option.):
Day One: God is Good
Read pgs. 45-49
Additional verses to read if you wish - Ephesians 1:3-14 (consider the blessings), Psalm 34:8 and 106:1 (responding to His goodness), Romans 8:28-39 (providing perspective on God's goodness in painful and difficult situations)
Consider a situation when you may have been tempted to question God's goodness.
Praise Him for His goodness no matter what your circumstances.
Day Two: God is Loving
Read pages 50-54
Additional scripture about God's love for us:
John 15:13, John 3:16, Romans 5:8, 1 John 4:7-10
How can we reconcile the reality and truth of God's love for us with what we feel?
Personalize Paul's prayer for yourself in Ephesians 3:14-19
Day Three: God is Enough
Read pages 54-55
Consider the messages we find in our culture telling us what we need to be "truly fulfilled, happy, and complete".
Scripture:
Colossians 2:9-10 What does it mean to experience "fullness" and "completeness" in Christ?
Do we really believe that when we have God, we have enough. What pluses to we add on, thinking we also need those to be happy? How can we wean ourselves from the earthly, temporal things to the spiritual eternal ones?
Psalm 73:23-26 (pray these verses for yourself)
Day Four: The Law of Liberty
Read pages 55-56
Consider how God's laws are beneficial and how obedience can be a blessing.
Additional scripture:
Deut. 6:24-25
James 1:19-27
Day Five: Divine Delays and Denials
Read pages 56-58
Consider how society offers "quick fixes" to our problems. Are you facing or have you faced a trial you've asked God to remove, and He has not? How is God working through that trial in your life?
Scripture to ponder:
2 Corinthians 12:7-10
Job 23:10
Romans 5:3-4
James 1:2-4
Consider some of the lies we sometimes believe about God and the truth of who He really is. Which ones have you struggled with?
----------------
Even if you're not reading the book, and something rings true for you in these posts, we would love to hear your input. Please refer to the comments section of this post, and to the Blog Frog Discussion. I would love to hear your thoughts and struggles...and prayer requests. If you wish to post on your blog, there is also a linky below.
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Update and Bible Study Reminder
I just wanted to thank everyone who is praying for my friend, Dinah. She is now out of the hospital, and living life...soaking in every moment with her family. She has chosen to place her trust in the Lord, who numbers our days, and holds our very next breath. She has been out and about, recovering from Monday's difficulties quite miraculously. This time is a gift, and I'm so grateful for her determined, amazing spirit. We are continuing to pray for her and her family...and rejoicing with them for this gift of time...for another day. My mother used to love the saying, "I'm not a person dying from cancer...I'm a person living with cancer." That sounds about right....the living part.
And...also a quick reminder...
Tomorrow, we will be posting on Chapter One of the Lies and Truth Bible Study. Hope you are able to join us. If you do not have a book, and still wish to join in, there will be an opportunity to get one on tomorrow's post. I purchased three extras to give to those who need one. Just leave a request on tomorrow's post to enter. Please be ready to share your thoughts. I'm so excited about this study and hope we can all be an encouragement to one another!
Also, I posted a new/old post on the WWY blog that may be an encouragement to those walking through loss...especially those new to grief.
And...also a quick reminder...
Tomorrow, we will be posting on Chapter One of the Lies and Truth Bible Study. Hope you are able to join us. If you do not have a book, and still wish to join in, there will be an opportunity to get one on tomorrow's post. I purchased three extras to give to those who need one. Just leave a request on tomorrow's post to enter. Please be ready to share your thoughts. I'm so excited about this study and hope we can all be an encouragement to one another!
Also, I posted a new/old post on the WWY blog that may be an encouragement to those walking through loss...especially those new to grief.
Beauty from Ashes ~ Grief's Extraordinary Journey
This is a post from the early days of The Beauty of Sufficient Grace blog on the subject of grief. I thought it may be helpful to those who are new to grief, and wanted to share it here....
The following text was originally published in The Women's Edge Newsletter by Sufficient Grace Ministries for Women, Inc. and written by Kelly Gerken.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted...To comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion-To bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. - Isaiah 61:1b-3
As Christians, we have the peace of knowing that because Jesus Christ died on the cross for our sins, and rose again, that we will never taste death. We will have eternal life in heaven with Him. What a blessed assurance! Unfortunately, we still live in a world that faces death and loss everyday. And, although there is the wonderful promise of heaven, those of us who remain on this Earth still must grieve the losses of those we love (even if we are just separated for a short time.).
There are stages of grief that most people go through: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. Others describe numbness, disorganization, and reorganization. Each individual is unique in their grief . A variety of responses are "normal" and can be expected, such as : anger, resentment, pain, sorrow, bitterness, emptiness, numbness, exhaustion, apathy, depression, and even some joy as you remember your loved one, peace as you think of your loved one in heaven with Jesus. There are so many feelings that come at will and even when the overwhelming sorrow has passed and a new form of "normalcy" has returned, you may out of no where, when you least expect it, feel grief's gripping waves overtake you once more.
Walking the journey of grief is an extraordinary test of our faith, and our will. Grief is a tumultuous sea, a relentless roller coaster that we cannot control or escape. The pain often comes in great waves, and tosses us about in a "sea of grief", so powerful that we may feel as if we are drowning. It is important to realize that it takes much time to heal and mourn. Unfortunately, there is no fast forward button for grief. So go gently. Be patient with yourself and your grief. Even when we know that our loved one is in heaven, we rejoice for our loved one, but we cry for ourselves. Our tears are for those of us who are left on this earth to ache for them, to miss and long for their physical presence, as we face the emptiness of walking through our days without the one we love. While we have great hope in Jesus and the amazing promise of Heaven, we acknowledge that there is a time to grieve, and we must take the time we need to do so.
The hope that we have as Christians is that we don't have to drown alone in our sea of grief. Our heavenly Father is able and willing to carry us when we cannot walk through the difficult journeys of this life ourselves. All that we can do is cling to Him, believing His promises. Some days we may not even have the strength to cling to Jesus, and in those moments, He will hold on to us because He is merciful and loving, full of grace and truth and comfort. He promises to never leave us nor forsake us. We have a great opportunity in the despair of grief to ask ourselves if we really believe His promises. When the waves of doubt come crashing in over our head, we must remember who our Lord is and what He has already done for us, in us, and through us. We can search His word and find hope and peace. We can look back on our own lives and see evidence of His hand gently leading and guiding our lives.
How do we face the task of walking through our days, passing the ordinary time, as the world around us goes about the business of life, while our world has shattered into a million pieces? The best advice I have heard comes form Elizabeth Elliott, who has experience great loss in her life. She says, "Just do the next thing.". Maybe the next thing is as simple as getting out of bed, putting one foot in front of the other, or just brushing your teeth. Sometimes there is great comfort in just the ordinary small, one step at a time pace of life that can carry you through to the next day. We can take comfort in knowing that God's mercies are new every morning and great is His faithfulness. Slowly, one baby step at a time toward normalcy, we will see the promise of a new day, a light at the end of the tunnel of grief. With time, those who grieve will heal and joy will be restored..
Taking the time to remember our loved one is an important and precious part of the grieving process. Some find comfort in journaling, creating a memory book of pictures and memories of the moments that make up our lives together. Sometimes it's the simple everyday memories that mean the most- a smile, a touch, a hug, a laugh, a smell. In the case of losing a baby or a child whose life was cut short, we not only feel the empty loss of the person, but also of all the dreams we hold for that precious life that ended so suddenly.
The old saying "time heals all wounds" has some truth to it, but I believe what is really happening in that time is that God is working in us to heal and restore us.. You may have heard the analogy that we cannot see the wind, but we see the evidence that wind exists as it blows the leaves on the trees. We can feel the wind on our face and hear the sound of it blowing past. I think God works in those invisible ways. We cannot see Him, but we see the evidence of His work in our lives. We feel the comfort of His Presence.
My friend Dinah gives a great analogy of how God mysteriously works. She likens it to the changing of the seasons. In the autumn the leaves change colors. Often though it is so gradual, so subtle that we don't realize it fully until one day the tress are orange, yellow, red and brown instead of green. In the same way as winter approached, the leaves fall from the tress. One day, we notice that the leaves are gone. We know they must have been falling for some time, but it was so subtle and gradual that we hardly noticed, until, one day when they were all gone and the land was stark and bare. When spring comes, everything brings forth new life. What once was dead is alive again. And one day it happens. You wake up and the leaves have returned once more - green and shiny and new. You can't point to a time when they began to bloom, exactly. You may have seen a bud or two. But it seems that it is sudden. In reality it was happening all the time, subtle, gradual, unseen, changing and restoring life. That is the best illustration I have heard of the way the Holy Spirit works in us to heal and restore. How subtly God works in us to change us until one day what once was, is no more. One day , we are no longer struggling. We have overcome what once held us captive, be it bitterness, pain, grief, or sin. God had been healing us all along, working while we struggled. He will take the tatters ashes of the broken hearts and made them into something beautiful ... God will use every tear, every moment of brokenness to make beauty from ashes to heal our pain and restore our joy.
~ Taken from the Dreams of You Memory Book written by Kelly Gerken and published by Sufficient Grace Ministries for Women, Inc. Copyright 2004-2008
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:A time to be born and a time to die...A time to weep and a time to laugh...A time to mourn and a time to dance...
The following text was originally published in The Women's Edge Newsletter by Sufficient Grace Ministries for Women, Inc. and written by Kelly Gerken.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted...To comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion-To bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. - Isaiah 61:1b-3
As Christians, we have the peace of knowing that because Jesus Christ died on the cross for our sins, and rose again, that we will never taste death. We will have eternal life in heaven with Him. What a blessed assurance! Unfortunately, we still live in a world that faces death and loss everyday. And, although there is the wonderful promise of heaven, those of us who remain on this Earth still must grieve the losses of those we love (even if we are just separated for a short time.).
There are stages of grief that most people go through: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. Others describe numbness, disorganization, and reorganization. Each individual is unique in their grief . A variety of responses are "normal" and can be expected, such as : anger, resentment, pain, sorrow, bitterness, emptiness, numbness, exhaustion, apathy, depression, and even some joy as you remember your loved one, peace as you think of your loved one in heaven with Jesus. There are so many feelings that come at will and even when the overwhelming sorrow has passed and a new form of "normalcy" has returned, you may out of no where, when you least expect it, feel grief's gripping waves overtake you once more.
Walking the journey of grief is an extraordinary test of our faith, and our will. Grief is a tumultuous sea, a relentless roller coaster that we cannot control or escape. The pain often comes in great waves, and tosses us about in a "sea of grief", so powerful that we may feel as if we are drowning. It is important to realize that it takes much time to heal and mourn. Unfortunately, there is no fast forward button for grief. So go gently. Be patient with yourself and your grief. Even when we know that our loved one is in heaven, we rejoice for our loved one, but we cry for ourselves. Our tears are for those of us who are left on this earth to ache for them, to miss and long for their physical presence, as we face the emptiness of walking through our days without the one we love. While we have great hope in Jesus and the amazing promise of Heaven, we acknowledge that there is a time to grieve, and we must take the time we need to do so.
The hope that we have as Christians is that we don't have to drown alone in our sea of grief. Our heavenly Father is able and willing to carry us when we cannot walk through the difficult journeys of this life ourselves. All that we can do is cling to Him, believing His promises. Some days we may not even have the strength to cling to Jesus, and in those moments, He will hold on to us because He is merciful and loving, full of grace and truth and comfort. He promises to never leave us nor forsake us. We have a great opportunity in the despair of grief to ask ourselves if we really believe His promises. When the waves of doubt come crashing in over our head, we must remember who our Lord is and what He has already done for us, in us, and through us. We can search His word and find hope and peace. We can look back on our own lives and see evidence of His hand gently leading and guiding our lives.
How do we face the task of walking through our days, passing the ordinary time, as the world around us goes about the business of life, while our world has shattered into a million pieces? The best advice I have heard comes form Elizabeth Elliott, who has experience great loss in her life. She says, "Just do the next thing.". Maybe the next thing is as simple as getting out of bed, putting one foot in front of the other, or just brushing your teeth. Sometimes there is great comfort in just the ordinary small, one step at a time pace of life that can carry you through to the next day. We can take comfort in knowing that God's mercies are new every morning and great is His faithfulness. Slowly, one baby step at a time toward normalcy, we will see the promise of a new day, a light at the end of the tunnel of grief. With time, those who grieve will heal and joy will be restored..
Taking the time to remember our loved one is an important and precious part of the grieving process. Some find comfort in journaling, creating a memory book of pictures and memories of the moments that make up our lives together. Sometimes it's the simple everyday memories that mean the most- a smile, a touch, a hug, a laugh, a smell. In the case of losing a baby or a child whose life was cut short, we not only feel the empty loss of the person, but also of all the dreams we hold for that precious life that ended so suddenly.
The old saying "time heals all wounds" has some truth to it, but I believe what is really happening in that time is that God is working in us to heal and restore us.. You may have heard the analogy that we cannot see the wind, but we see the evidence that wind exists as it blows the leaves on the trees. We can feel the wind on our face and hear the sound of it blowing past. I think God works in those invisible ways. We cannot see Him, but we see the evidence of His work in our lives. We feel the comfort of His Presence.
My friend Dinah gives a great analogy of how God mysteriously works. She likens it to the changing of the seasons. In the autumn the leaves change colors. Often though it is so gradual, so subtle that we don't realize it fully until one day the tress are orange, yellow, red and brown instead of green. In the same way as winter approached, the leaves fall from the tress. One day, we notice that the leaves are gone. We know they must have been falling for some time, but it was so subtle and gradual that we hardly noticed, until, one day when they were all gone and the land was stark and bare. When spring comes, everything brings forth new life. What once was dead is alive again. And one day it happens. You wake up and the leaves have returned once more - green and shiny and new. You can't point to a time when they began to bloom, exactly. You may have seen a bud or two. But it seems that it is sudden. In reality it was happening all the time, subtle, gradual, unseen, changing and restoring life. That is the best illustration I have heard of the way the Holy Spirit works in us to heal and restore. How subtly God works in us to change us until one day what once was, is no more. One day , we are no longer struggling. We have overcome what once held us captive, be it bitterness, pain, grief, or sin. God had been healing us all along, working while we struggled. He will take the tatters ashes of the broken hearts and made them into something beautiful ... God will use every tear, every moment of brokenness to make beauty from ashes to heal our pain and restore our joy.
~ Taken from the Dreams of You Memory Book written by Kelly Gerken and published by Sufficient Grace Ministries for Women, Inc. Copyright 2004-2008
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:A time to be born and a time to die...A time to weep and a time to laugh...A time to mourn and a time to dance...
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Shaken
Tonight I'm feeling a little shaken.
I have been purposing in my heart to make some changes. To run toward the Lord, to cling to Him, not to seek comfort in the things of this world, or my stinky onion layers. I have been desiring life and joy...determined, focused, excited about the Lies and Truth Bible Study...ready for a new year, a new adventure...excited to see what the Lord has in store for our family and Sufficient Grace Ministries in 2011. I've been having a grand time, getting my groove on with the Just Dance 2 game on our Wii. Dancing until I am out of breath, dripping with sweat, and laughing hysterically at myself. Good stuff.
The thing is, we are not in charge. We never know what is waiting around the corner. We may think we are going to get our dance on and wallow in a season of joy, reaping a harvest of the fruit that comes from sowing our tears during the seasons of sorrow.
We think we are ready for one thing.
And, something entirely different punches us square in the face shattering our plans.
I have shared before that watching my mother suffer and die from cancer was a struggle unlike any other in my life. It changed me...for the rest of my time on this Earth. Although I have leaned on the Lord, and felt His comfort and strength. I miss her daily...yet even in my missing, His grace is sufficient for me. I dream my dreams of longing for her...some ending bitterly. I experience her days of suffering like the flashes of a veteran returning from war. And...still His grace is sufficient for me.
Paul speaks in Corinthians of his thorn in the flesh. It was something that wasn't taken from him...something he struggled with all his days on this earth. Many of us have thorns in the flesh...illness, pain, sorrow, grief, loneliness, depression, physical and/or mental disabilities. We have imperfections, flaws, quirks. Call them what you want.
This afternoon, I heard that one of my dearest friends who has been battling cancer was taken to the hospital. She has endured radiation, chemotherapy, all sorts of procedures and medicines, and other forms of torture to fight the cancer in her lungs and brain and perhaps other places in her body over the past couple years.
This woman taught me how to be a wife, with her sweet, snarky way of telling me how it is. With her straight-talking ways, she drilled into my young, selfish, raised-in-a-household-where-women-were-in-authority mind the importance of honoring my husband and caring for my home...and training up Godly young men. She walked with me through the deaths of my twin daughters, Faith and Grace...and later my son, Thomas. She sat beside us as her husband delivered Thomas' eulogy under the blue sky with big, fluffy white clouds while the sun shone on our grief-stricken faces. One of a handful of people whose eyes looked upon our Thomas, she saw and appreciated his beauty. Her house was always the best place to have parties...the best food and fellowship. Her special gift has been making her home a haven for all who entered. She can make the best apple pie on God's green earth. She prays fiercely for everyone in her life...no doubt her prayers helped keep my marriage together through the toughest years. She loves and "gets" teenagers...and they love her right back. When in good health, she visited and encouraged, and genuinely loved those in prison as she helped deliver the gospel to them. Her words are part of the story...our story...shared in the Dreams of You Memory Book. Dinah and I are always saying..."The most beautiful gifts in this life emerge from some of the most difficult suffering. It's in the hard stuff that beauty is born." Saying it is much different than walking it.
She is my second mom. And, like my first mom...cancer has stolen much from her. She has toughed it out...much like she toughed out everything else this life has dealt her so far...with a perfect blend of grit and grace. I love her dearly.
And...tonight, she is laying in a hospital bed.
The outcome is uncertain, for now, as far as the condition of her physical body and mind. She has survived much more than doctors expected. And, we serve a God who makes all things possible.
I am trying not to look with my eyes....
Trying not to remember the flashes of the moments I watched cancer steal my own mother's mind and body...
Praying for my beautiful friend, Dinah, and her beautiful family.
Trusting that the same God who carried my mother and I through those days...will carry Dinah and her family in these days. Knowing that He is faithful.
When my mother was in the hospice center, Dinah sent me these verses:
Even to your old age, I am He,
And even to gray hairs I will carry you!
I have made, and I will bear;
Even I will carry, and will deliver you.
~ Isaiah 46:4
Verses I whispered to my mother as she longed for reassurance of His promises in the last moments of her life...
Tonight, I am shaken...
But my God is steadfast and sure. He is not moved...
But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellence of the power may be of God and not of us. We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed... ~ 2 Corinth. 4:7-9
Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal. ~ 2 Corinthians 4:16-20
When my world is shaking, heaven stands...when my heart is breaking, I never leave Your hands...
~JJ Heller
Please pray...
I have been purposing in my heart to make some changes. To run toward the Lord, to cling to Him, not to seek comfort in the things of this world, or my stinky onion layers. I have been desiring life and joy...determined, focused, excited about the Lies and Truth Bible Study...ready for a new year, a new adventure...excited to see what the Lord has in store for our family and Sufficient Grace Ministries in 2011. I've been having a grand time, getting my groove on with the Just Dance 2 game on our Wii. Dancing until I am out of breath, dripping with sweat, and laughing hysterically at myself. Good stuff.
The thing is, we are not in charge. We never know what is waiting around the corner. We may think we are going to get our dance on and wallow in a season of joy, reaping a harvest of the fruit that comes from sowing our tears during the seasons of sorrow.
We think we are ready for one thing.
And, something entirely different punches us square in the face shattering our plans.
I have shared before that watching my mother suffer and die from cancer was a struggle unlike any other in my life. It changed me...for the rest of my time on this Earth. Although I have leaned on the Lord, and felt His comfort and strength. I miss her daily...yet even in my missing, His grace is sufficient for me. I dream my dreams of longing for her...some ending bitterly. I experience her days of suffering like the flashes of a veteran returning from war. And...still His grace is sufficient for me.
Paul speaks in Corinthians of his thorn in the flesh. It was something that wasn't taken from him...something he struggled with all his days on this earth. Many of us have thorns in the flesh...illness, pain, sorrow, grief, loneliness, depression, physical and/or mental disabilities. We have imperfections, flaws, quirks. Call them what you want.
This afternoon, I heard that one of my dearest friends who has been battling cancer was taken to the hospital. She has endured radiation, chemotherapy, all sorts of procedures and medicines, and other forms of torture to fight the cancer in her lungs and brain and perhaps other places in her body over the past couple years.
This woman taught me how to be a wife, with her sweet, snarky way of telling me how it is. With her straight-talking ways, she drilled into my young, selfish, raised-in-a-household-where-women-were-in-authority mind the importance of honoring my husband and caring for my home...and training up Godly young men. She walked with me through the deaths of my twin daughters, Faith and Grace...and later my son, Thomas. She sat beside us as her husband delivered Thomas' eulogy under the blue sky with big, fluffy white clouds while the sun shone on our grief-stricken faces. One of a handful of people whose eyes looked upon our Thomas, she saw and appreciated his beauty. Her house was always the best place to have parties...the best food and fellowship. Her special gift has been making her home a haven for all who entered. She can make the best apple pie on God's green earth. She prays fiercely for everyone in her life...no doubt her prayers helped keep my marriage together through the toughest years. She loves and "gets" teenagers...and they love her right back. When in good health, she visited and encouraged, and genuinely loved those in prison as she helped deliver the gospel to them. Her words are part of the story...our story...shared in the Dreams of You Memory Book. Dinah and I are always saying..."The most beautiful gifts in this life emerge from some of the most difficult suffering. It's in the hard stuff that beauty is born." Saying it is much different than walking it.
She is my second mom. And, like my first mom...cancer has stolen much from her. She has toughed it out...much like she toughed out everything else this life has dealt her so far...with a perfect blend of grit and grace. I love her dearly.
And...tonight, she is laying in a hospital bed.
The outcome is uncertain, for now, as far as the condition of her physical body and mind. She has survived much more than doctors expected. And, we serve a God who makes all things possible.
I am trying not to look with my eyes....
Trying not to remember the flashes of the moments I watched cancer steal my own mother's mind and body...
Praying for my beautiful friend, Dinah, and her beautiful family.
Trusting that the same God who carried my mother and I through those days...will carry Dinah and her family in these days. Knowing that He is faithful.
When my mother was in the hospice center, Dinah sent me these verses:
Even to your old age, I am He,
And even to gray hairs I will carry you!
I have made, and I will bear;
Even I will carry, and will deliver you.
~ Isaiah 46:4
Verses I whispered to my mother as she longed for reassurance of His promises in the last moments of her life...
Tonight, I am shaken...
But my God is steadfast and sure. He is not moved...
But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellence of the power may be of God and not of us. We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed... ~ 2 Corinth. 4:7-9
Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal. ~ 2 Corinthians 4:16-20
When my world is shaking, heaven stands...when my heart is breaking, I never leave Your hands...
~JJ Heller
Please pray...
Monday, January 3, 2011
The Lies Women Believe...How it all Began (Intro.)
For this first installment of the Lies Women Believe And the Truth that Sets Them Free Bible Study, we will be covering the introduction and prologue found on pages 15-28. Before we begin, I hope you will keep this study and all who are participating in prayer. The Truth is a powerful thing, and the Deceiver does not want us to find freedom in the truth of God's word. I'll share a little secret with you. Almost every time I post something spiritual on this blog or speak publicly about what God has done, I am attacked spiritually in that area of my life. (The week I shared about my hormonal struggle, I was a basket case of emotion, crying in public...just a complete puddle!) So, know going in...some of these truths may be difficult to hear and it may be even more difficult to take the necessary steps to seek freedom in those areas in which we struggle. Praying for each other is key. There are some strongholds that will not come down without focused, intentional prayer! On our own, we are powerless against a fierce enemy and a weak flesh, but with the Holy Spirit, we can overcome our weaknesses, find victory over our failures, restoration in the brokenness, and healing for our wounds. God is able! Freedom is waiting for us, freedom from so many of the bondages that hold us back.
Let's get started...
I'll begin by sharing some of the points that spoke to me, and I hope you will share yours as well. I want it to be easy to participate, so I'll include a Linky if you want to do a post about this topic and link here...or you may feel free to share your thoughts in the comment section of this post...or, we can have further discussion on the blog frog discussion on the right sidebar. (We'll start the blog frog discussions next week when we delve into actual topics. This week is just intro. stuff.) That way we can have a conversation-type discussion that all can participate in. Whatever makes it easiest for you to join in....we like grace here, as you can see!
Nancy takes us on a journey to the Garden of Eden, where the deception began....the birthplace of our battle with sin, death, and all that goes along with it. Oh, how God meant something different for us. It first struck me so powerfully when I visited The Creation Museum with James and our church family last spring...the beauty that God meant for His people and for all of creation. And the devastating destruction that ensued from the Fall.
Flash to today...thousands of years later. The same lies stealing our energy...our joy...our freedom. Women walking around...or running around in many cases...with a "soul sickness". Full schedules, but an emptiness in our hearts. Busy, busy, busy...but with distracted hearts and minds. Some of the adjectives in the introduction hit the nail on the head...for me and for many of my friends in real life and blog land.
frazzled
exhausted
defeated
confused
depressed
ashamed
burned-out
overwhelmed
discouraged
fearful
lonely
insecure
The list goes on...
Nancy talks about bondage...about not being free. The bondage faced, not just by those following the "world's" formula for success...but Christians as well. Women praying beside you at a prayer group, sitting in the church pew lifting their voices in worship, standing behind a podium sharing their testimony. These are the struggles we don't talk about...the struggles behind our smiles and nods. Bondage to our past....our sins and failures...the need for the approval of others...unhealthy attitudes in relation to food.
None of it is what God intended for us.
Jesus said, "I am come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly." John 10:10
Here are some of the adjectives He wants for our lives:
free
gracious
loving
confident
contented
stable
joyous
peaceful
radiant
Nancy shares the root of our struggles is that we have been lied to...deceived. So, the answer...the key to freedom lies in dispelling the deception with the truth...shining light in the dark places. That may mean we have to walk in and acknowledge some of those dark places...even if just to ourselves. Sometimes that is really tough. But, when Nancy talks about "believing and acting on the Truth (as) our means to freedom - not just survival, not escape - but true, glorious freedom, in the midst of this fallen, corrupt, hurting world" I find myself saying...I want that.
It is for freedom that Christ has set us free.
Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves
be burdened again with the yoke of slavery.
Galatians 5:1
I have been set free...and, in some areas, I have allowed myself to become burdened again with the yoke of slavery. The standing firm part seems to be the key. We have to resist the temptation to allow what Jesus has set us free from to creep back into our lives and take over again. As we discuss each "lie", I will share more in depth some of the areas I struggle with, and I hope we can share, encourage, and pray for each other in the coming weeks.
In the prologue, Nancy takes us back to the garden...and we see Eve's heart. I love how she becomes real to us in this book...a woman with the same longings...the same feelings that we have today. There is a reason Satan uses the same lies He used thousands of years ago, ladies. It's because they still work. Our world may look much different, and move at a faster pace. But, many things...the core things underneath it all, in the depths of our hearts and souls...they haven't changed. We may want to tell ourselves how much more intelligent and evolved we are as a society. We can say it if we want, I suppose, but it's really not true. Not in the eternal things that truly matter. In those areas...our struggles are no different than those Adam and Eve faced in the garden.
This study from Nancy Leigh DeMoss's book, Lies Women Believe and the Truth That Sets Them Free, is going to be revealing and stripping...and hopefully liberating and healing. I'm really looking forward to it, and hope you'll join in with us. I'll include a linky if you have something to post on this week's topic, but if not that's o.k. You are always welcome to share your heart in the comments section. Since this is just an intro., we will wait until next week to add a discussion to the blog frog. If you need a book, they are available at your local Christian bookstore, http://www.cbd.com/, Amazon, your local library, or let us know if you are unable to get one. I have ordered a couple extra copies and we will gladly mail you one. This is a book/study you do not want to miss, ladies. It is truly worth your time...and believe me, I know how fleeting and valuable time is for a busy woman!
Next week (January 10th), we will be covering Chapter One - Truth or Consequences. Week Three (January 17th) we will begin to get into the nitty gritty with Chapter Two - Lies Women Believe...About God.
Let's get started...
I'll begin by sharing some of the points that spoke to me, and I hope you will share yours as well. I want it to be easy to participate, so I'll include a Linky if you want to do a post about this topic and link here...or you may feel free to share your thoughts in the comment section of this post...or, we can have further discussion on the blog frog discussion on the right sidebar. (We'll start the blog frog discussions next week when we delve into actual topics. This week is just intro. stuff.) That way we can have a conversation-type discussion that all can participate in. Whatever makes it easiest for you to join in....we like grace here, as you can see!
Nancy takes us on a journey to the Garden of Eden, where the deception began....the birthplace of our battle with sin, death, and all that goes along with it. Oh, how God meant something different for us. It first struck me so powerfully when I visited The Creation Museum with James and our church family last spring...the beauty that God meant for His people and for all of creation. And the devastating destruction that ensued from the Fall.
Flash to today...thousands of years later. The same lies stealing our energy...our joy...our freedom. Women walking around...or running around in many cases...with a "soul sickness". Full schedules, but an emptiness in our hearts. Busy, busy, busy...but with distracted hearts and minds. Some of the adjectives in the introduction hit the nail on the head...for me and for many of my friends in real life and blog land.
frazzled
exhausted
defeated
confused
depressed
ashamed
burned-out
overwhelmed
discouraged
fearful
lonely
insecure
The list goes on...
Nancy talks about bondage...about not being free. The bondage faced, not just by those following the "world's" formula for success...but Christians as well. Women praying beside you at a prayer group, sitting in the church pew lifting their voices in worship, standing behind a podium sharing their testimony. These are the struggles we don't talk about...the struggles behind our smiles and nods. Bondage to our past....our sins and failures...the need for the approval of others...unhealthy attitudes in relation to food.
None of it is what God intended for us.
Jesus said, "I am come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly." John 10:10
Here are some of the adjectives He wants for our lives:
free
gracious
loving
confident
contented
stable
joyous
peaceful
radiant
Nancy shares the root of our struggles is that we have been lied to...deceived. So, the answer...the key to freedom lies in dispelling the deception with the truth...shining light in the dark places. That may mean we have to walk in and acknowledge some of those dark places...even if just to ourselves. Sometimes that is really tough. But, when Nancy talks about "believing and acting on the Truth (as) our means to freedom - not just survival, not escape - but true, glorious freedom, in the midst of this fallen, corrupt, hurting world" I find myself saying...I want that.
It is for freedom that Christ has set us free.
Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves
be burdened again with the yoke of slavery.
Galatians 5:1
I have been set free...and, in some areas, I have allowed myself to become burdened again with the yoke of slavery. The standing firm part seems to be the key. We have to resist the temptation to allow what Jesus has set us free from to creep back into our lives and take over again. As we discuss each "lie", I will share more in depth some of the areas I struggle with, and I hope we can share, encourage, and pray for each other in the coming weeks.
In the prologue, Nancy takes us back to the garden...and we see Eve's heart. I love how she becomes real to us in this book...a woman with the same longings...the same feelings that we have today. There is a reason Satan uses the same lies He used thousands of years ago, ladies. It's because they still work. Our world may look much different, and move at a faster pace. But, many things...the core things underneath it all, in the depths of our hearts and souls...they haven't changed. We may want to tell ourselves how much more intelligent and evolved we are as a society. We can say it if we want, I suppose, but it's really not true. Not in the eternal things that truly matter. In those areas...our struggles are no different than those Adam and Eve faced in the garden.
This study from Nancy Leigh DeMoss's book, Lies Women Believe and the Truth That Sets Them Free, is going to be revealing and stripping...and hopefully liberating and healing. I'm really looking forward to it, and hope you'll join in with us. I'll include a linky if you have something to post on this week's topic, but if not that's o.k. You are always welcome to share your heart in the comments section. Since this is just an intro., we will wait until next week to add a discussion to the blog frog. If you need a book, they are available at your local Christian bookstore, http://www.cbd.com/, Amazon, your local library, or let us know if you are unable to get one. I have ordered a couple extra copies and we will gladly mail you one. This is a book/study you do not want to miss, ladies. It is truly worth your time...and believe me, I know how fleeting and valuable time is for a busy woman!
Next week (January 10th), we will be covering Chapter One - Truth or Consequences. Week Three (January 17th) we will begin to get into the nitty gritty with Chapter Two - Lies Women Believe...About God.
Saturday, January 1, 2011
New Walking With You Post
Just wanted to share that there is a new Walking With You post up. Click on over to read and share your thoughts.
Also...the Sufficient Grace Ministries Coming Events Page has been updated. Click over to see what's coming up. Please pray for upcoming SGM events.
And...just for your information, I plan to spend the rest of my day nestled in my Browns Snuggie (actually called The Huddler...but they're all snuggies to me) watching football, snacking on yummy food, and hanging out with my boys. The bigs and the little.
Happy New Year!
Also...the Sufficient Grace Ministries Coming Events Page has been updated. Click over to see what's coming up. Please pray for upcoming SGM events.
And...just for your information, I plan to spend the rest of my day nestled in my Browns Snuggie (actually called The Huddler...but they're all snuggies to me) watching football, snacking on yummy food, and hanging out with my boys. The bigs and the little.
Happy New Year!
Announcing a New Women's Bible Study, Christmas, and How Are You Doing?
As we settle in to a New Year, I just want to share how grateful I am for this community of women and the friendships we have come to share in this blog world. I know the Christmas season can be a difficult one for many, and I hope that there were some moments of comfort and peace for each of you this year.
To kick off the year with a fresh start, we will be doing a bible study on Nancy Leigh Demoss's book, Lies Women Believe and the Truth That Sets Them Free. It is one of my favorites, and I'm so excited to delve into it in the coming weeks. I hope many of you will be able to join in, as well....even if just to read along and share your heart as you feel led.
This book is not specifically about grief, but it does address many of the areas we struggle with as women. So, I think it will be helpful...whatever you are facing. We will not be doing a weekly Walking With You, as I will be doing the study on The Beauty of Sufficient Grace blog, beginning Monday, January 3rd, and continuing each Monday after for several weeks. You can tune in there to participate and/or read along.
In an effort to keep in touch and share what's on our hearts, though...I would love to hear how you are doing...how this Christmas was for you and your family...what prayer requests you have...what's on your heart for the coming year. Please share in the comments of this post...or leave a link to a blog post you may wish to share, and I'll get over to visit.
My Christmas was busy, as always! We usually have what I call a Marathon of Christmas celebrations over the course of a few days. This year was no exception. In the frenzy, I try to grasp moments of peace and reflection as I think of the reason for all of the celebration...the gift of our Savior. There were moment's like that...standing at the candlelight service, listening to my husband's guitar and the voices of our church family blending with mine as we sang Silent Night. And there were moments of laughter with family and friends...good food, fun presents.
There were also, moments of missing...as there always are. The time after the children open their presents on Christmas morning...when I would normally call my mother to give her my recap of the morning and chat with her while cooking Christmas dinner to prepare for the evening celebration at my house. I ache for her with a fresh longing each year, wishing desperately to hear her voice. I dreamed that I was talking to her on the phone. But, the dream ended so quickly. Times when bittersweet memories wash over me, as I hung ornaments on the tree in memory of Faith, Grace, and Thomas and my mother's ornaments. Reminders that while we celebrate here, there are some missing from our celebration...ones we love who celebrate in heaven.
Angie Smith calls it The Sacred Dance of Grief and Joy....and rightly so. That's exactly what this life is. A dance of grief and joy, interwoven into the tapestry of our lives. They are not completely separate...one from the other. But, they dance together in the moments we walk through. They dance together, and we must find a way to dance along with them. I don't claim to have the answer to that...and truthfully, I'm too clumsy to try and learn the perfect steps, and, therefore, ill-equipped to teach them. I prefer to take my Savior's hand, and follow His lead...knowing that the best I can hope for is to be carried along life's dance in His loving arms.
Oh...I almost forgot...there was one special moment I wanted to share. One that was sacred and touching. Tim and I received a precious gift from his grandmother this Christmas. It had three sweet baby angels on the sides of a lovely bowl. It was a gift in memory of our three babies in heaven. What made it even more precious...more meaningful than I can even convey...was that it is the first time our babies were remembered at Christmas on that side of his family...the first time in fourteen years. We received it with tears in our eyes...touched beyond words to know that our Faith, Grace, and Thomas were acknowledged and remembered. I won't lie...it touched places in my heart that are so tender, I prefer to keep them covered with layers of protection. But, it was good. Good to have that place of tenderness touched. Good to know they were remembered. Good to see God's grace washing over all of us...gently healing deep wounds, reminding us that He sees...that he values each life...that we are all precious in His sight.
Please know you are in our hearts and in our prayers as you continue this process of healing, missing your sweet baby and other loved ones, and take steps into a New Year...
Love to all...
To kick off the year with a fresh start, we will be doing a bible study on Nancy Leigh Demoss's book, Lies Women Believe and the Truth That Sets Them Free. It is one of my favorites, and I'm so excited to delve into it in the coming weeks. I hope many of you will be able to join in, as well....even if just to read along and share your heart as you feel led.
This book is not specifically about grief, but it does address many of the areas we struggle with as women. So, I think it will be helpful...whatever you are facing. We will not be doing a weekly Walking With You, as I will be doing the study on The Beauty of Sufficient Grace blog, beginning Monday, January 3rd, and continuing each Monday after for several weeks. You can tune in there to participate and/or read along.
In an effort to keep in touch and share what's on our hearts, though...I would love to hear how you are doing...how this Christmas was for you and your family...what prayer requests you have...what's on your heart for the coming year. Please share in the comments of this post...or leave a link to a blog post you may wish to share, and I'll get over to visit.
My Christmas was busy, as always! We usually have what I call a Marathon of Christmas celebrations over the course of a few days. This year was no exception. In the frenzy, I try to grasp moments of peace and reflection as I think of the reason for all of the celebration...the gift of our Savior. There were moment's like that...standing at the candlelight service, listening to my husband's guitar and the voices of our church family blending with mine as we sang Silent Night. And there were moments of laughter with family and friends...good food, fun presents.
There were also, moments of missing...as there always are. The time after the children open their presents on Christmas morning...when I would normally call my mother to give her my recap of the morning and chat with her while cooking Christmas dinner to prepare for the evening celebration at my house. I ache for her with a fresh longing each year, wishing desperately to hear her voice. I dreamed that I was talking to her on the phone. But, the dream ended so quickly. Times when bittersweet memories wash over me, as I hung ornaments on the tree in memory of Faith, Grace, and Thomas and my mother's ornaments. Reminders that while we celebrate here, there are some missing from our celebration...ones we love who celebrate in heaven.
Angie Smith calls it The Sacred Dance of Grief and Joy....and rightly so. That's exactly what this life is. A dance of grief and joy, interwoven into the tapestry of our lives. They are not completely separate...one from the other. But, they dance together in the moments we walk through. They dance together, and we must find a way to dance along with them. I don't claim to have the answer to that...and truthfully, I'm too clumsy to try and learn the perfect steps, and, therefore, ill-equipped to teach them. I prefer to take my Savior's hand, and follow His lead...knowing that the best I can hope for is to be carried along life's dance in His loving arms.
Oh...I almost forgot...there was one special moment I wanted to share. One that was sacred and touching. Tim and I received a precious gift from his grandmother this Christmas. It had three sweet baby angels on the sides of a lovely bowl. It was a gift in memory of our three babies in heaven. What made it even more precious...more meaningful than I can even convey...was that it is the first time our babies were remembered at Christmas on that side of his family...the first time in fourteen years. We received it with tears in our eyes...touched beyond words to know that our Faith, Grace, and Thomas were acknowledged and remembered. I won't lie...it touched places in my heart that are so tender, I prefer to keep them covered with layers of protection. But, it was good. Good to have that place of tenderness touched. Good to know they were remembered. Good to see God's grace washing over all of us...gently healing deep wounds, reminding us that He sees...that he values each life...that we are all precious in His sight.
Please know you are in our hearts and in our prayers as you continue this process of healing, missing your sweet baby and other loved ones, and take steps into a New Year...
Love to all...
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