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If you are new to our site, this blog is sort of a hodge podge of our ministry and family life, and whatever else God lays on my heart to share. The Home Page above will link you to our Sufficient Grace Ministries page. You can read more about the 501 (c) 3 non-profit organization and the outreaches of this ministry whose mission is to offer comfort and hope to grieving parents. The Blog button brings you to the page you are currently reading, featuring a variety of subjects...some ministry updates, some family news, and some biblically-based encouragement. The Walking With You page is a place for bereaved parents who have lost a baby or child to find encouragement and hope. It is an online support group created so that families would know they are not walking this path alone. On the Dreams of You Shop page, you can learn more about the products and services we offer, place an order, or sponsor a family. The Encouraging Women blog is a work in progress. There, we hope to offer biblically-based encouragement to all women. The Resource page has been newly updated with a list of resources that are helpful for grieving parents. Our blogroll is also located on this page. Thank you so much for visiting our site. Blessings to you...

Monday, April 25, 2011

What to Do When we Fall on our Face (Made to Crave) and Some Easter Pics

I'll be honest. I don't feel qualified to write this week's post.

I picked up my Made to Crave book this weekend hoping that Lysa would have some words of encouragement...some inspiring wisdom...for when we don't resist temptation. When we eat the Easter cookie (or three), relish the cheesy potatoes and ham, indulge in a second breadstick. Not that I've done any of that or anything. I would never. I am always walking in victory, a solid, unbreakable rock. Nothing can penetrate my resolve.

Who am I kidding? I ate all of the above and then some this week. Truthfully, I'm not even sure what happened. I lost two pounds the first half of the week, felt free, had some lovely devotions. And, then...I ate a second breadstick, and some trail mix, and a couple chips. Like an alcoholic falling off the wagon, I tumbled into a frenzy of eating what I wanted.

And, here's the trouble. The guilt is so extreme now that we are looking at our cravings in a spiritual light. I feel like I've done more than just cheat myself on this diet...I feel as if I'm not relying on God...and almost turning from Him and toward something else. In some ways, that's true...like when I reach for the chips in the midst of a heated debate with my teenage son or when I take another pile of bills out of the mailbox at the end of a long day. But, what about enjoying an Easter dinner with my family? Should I always feel guilt, every time I indulge? Should there be a balance? Where's the grace?

I've read Lysa's words about denying ourselves and having victory...that we were made for more than this. But, what about when we fall on our face, when we indulge, fail, crumble under the weight of temptation? And is it always wrong to enjoy some yummy, frivolous food?

The answer, I believe, came partly from this week's Made to Crave chapters...and partly from the Holy Spirit. (I'm sure He had a hand in all of it!)

Here's what I'm thinking:
There is still grace. And, the grace when we fall is that we can get back up again. We don't have to stay in the mud and muck, our faces all covered with cream cheese frosting and Dorito cheese caked on the ends of our fingers. When we've tried to do it in our own power, and failed, we can give it over to Him, trusting His grace to be sufficient...His strength to cover our weaknesses.

And...there will be a time when we can enjoy a treat now and again. But, first, there needs to be a season of "getting free". I have learned from the past few days of indulgence that I'm not completely free from this bondage or strong enough to keep from slipping into my old habits. It's like going to a bar for someone with a drinking problem, when that person has only been sober for a few weeks. We have to be ready....we have to be free. And, while we're "getting free" we have to stay away from indulgences...or at least severely limit them.

Now...chapters 10, 11, & 12...

Chapter Ten begins with three words that are not allowed in my house...and words I myself try not to say. (As a matter of fact, my friend Dinah was disgusted by these very words...and she's probably the reason I've never allowed them!)

This Isn't Fair!

It pained me just to type them! They are such a waste of time...wallowing in what's fair, complaining about what's not. Please. Lysa talks about coming to terms with...and even being grateful for the way God made us. He lovingly created each of us, after all. And, that includes the extra tummy I have from carrying five babies...(not the part that came from eating too many Doritos).

A helpful phrase from chapter 10: "This feels good now, but how will I feel about this in the morning?" Chew on that thought...instead of the cookie with the cream cheese frosting. I sure wish I would have taken my own advice today. Sometimes, we don't have to wait for the morning to feel the guilt settling in. We really are made for more than this....sigh.

Chapter 11 describes me. Food is and has been my numbing drug of choice when life gets tough. I loved the segment from Ruth Graham with this verse and message:

You have circled this mountain long enough. Now turn north. Deuteronomy 2:3

I could keep circling the mountain with my excuses. I could weep and mourn over my failures...even those as recent as today. Or, I could stop making excuses...give what weighs on my heart to God (again), and go north....eyes toward heaven, heart and mind focused on the Lord, leaning on His strength.

These words resonated with my heart and soul:
"Food gives such an instant rush and tangible good feeling. It's so much easier to figure out how to get the short-term high of a cookie than it is to get a heart filled up and satisfied with God. I can drive to the store and fill my arms with any kind of cookies I want. But wrapping my arms around getting "filled up" with God during a particularly empty feeling day doesn't seem as tangible or immediate."

A friend of mine shared those same thoughts about her indulgence in a whopper this week after a difficult day. And, I've lived it a thousand times. All the times when it just hurts so much, and I want immediate comfort. You see, when God fills you up...it is glorious and freeing, empowering, and full of love and grace. But, it takes time. You have to invest the time reading His word, seeking Him, praying. It's not immediate. But, the immediate stuff we fill ourselves with only feels good for a moment...and then steals our joy, peace, freedom...leaving us feeling more empty and often full of guilt.

Also loved how the Lord whispered this truth to Lysa's heart:
Even the perfect circumstances won't satisfy you like letting Me change the way you think.

He's whispering that same truth to you and me.

In Chapter 12, Lysa talks about one of my favorite subjects:
Remaining.
Dinah and I used to talk about remaining or abiding often...not being moved by our circumstances, but remaining in God's love and in His truth. Steadfastly abiding. Finding our happy in Him...not in being thin or achieving the next goal for our lives...but in Him. Choosing His ways, His thoughts, His plans. Because when we tie our happy to anything else, it can be stolen quickly when the hard stuff comes swooping in...as it always does.

Please pray for me this week, as I seek to get back on track with eating healthy and "remain" in Him. And, I'll be praying for you, too. And, please remember to encourage one another. Send our friend Kate some love as well.

I leave you with this verse that sums it up...and some Easter pics from this beautiful Resurrection Day:

And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge - that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God".  Ephesians 3:17-19

That's the kind of full I want...."Lord help me remember that the next time I try to get full some other way. Remind me that I was made for more, and fill me with the fullness of You."

And, now some random Easter pics...


Had a wonderful time with James telling the Easter story with Resurrection Eggs. One of my favorite traditions.




Lovin' on Max at church...
(By the way...I found the answer to the question, "What's a girl to do when she doesn't have any little girls this side of heaven to adorn in Easter bonnets and dresses?" Adorn herself!)

It's hard to wrangle boys into posing for pictures...well my boys at least! I love this one...love how little brother is looking up to big brother.



I think Dad's are much better at speaking the language of "boy wrangling".




Hope you had a wonderful Easter. It was a grand celebration with our church family this morning, and our little family at home in the afternoon. He is risen indeed!

8 comments:

Linda said...

Kelly...I love how you write! I feel like you are so real and so honest...and I love that you have a sense of humor. Even though there are so many truths in what you are saying here.

The favorite picture is the one with your hubby "wrangling" with the boys! That was sweet.

Glad you had a lovely Easter. He Is Risen indeed!

Love you,
Momma Linda

Spud said...

I love the pictures! Max is getting SO big! I think Timothy has grown more, too! I'm glad that you had a wonderful Easter.

I gave Chase a Bible in his Easter basket and when he saw it he said, "Oh, it's a God book!" It was adorable. He's still calling it his God book. :-D

Unknown said...

Thank you so much for talking about the guilt! I feel the exact same way, and way more awful now when I cheat a little or eat one more piece of something. It's like I would rather starve than cheat now, there is no balance! It's black or white, no gray. I struggle with all of that!! Thanks for your raw honesty, I needed to hear (read) that, and also know I am not alone! Here's to getting back on the skinny jean wagon!

Lori said...

You are seriously cute as a button! I love you adorning yourself!!!

And...I love how you wrote that writing those words "It's Not Fair" pains you...I totally can relate.

Thank God, though, we don't get what's fair to us, right?
xoxoxo

Jennifer Ross said...

I love the picture of the boys with their dad. lol

I probably ate enough this last week to keep three people full!lol Looks like I didn't do this book reading like I said I would. I'm sorry Kelly. I feel like I have so much to do, and I seriously can't get it all done. Which seems to be the way with lots of people. I take on too many "things" and get so far behind.

I watched the video of you doing your exercise.......... awesome! :) Great Easter pics too!

Hope you are doing great Kelly! I think of you often.

Madge said...

I'm doing a test comment to see if this works! :)

Madge said...

It worked!
I did a 40 day Daniel Fast last year and realized a lot about my food intake. I never noticed how I could easily polish off a half a bag of Puffed Cheetos and not think much of it...until I couldn't even have a Puffed Cheeto. I always knew I loved cheese, but didn't realize how MUCH I loved cheese until I couldn't have any. Then when I could start eating these foods again I realized how quickly I slipped back into eating more than I needed. So I'm thinking this book/study would be a great thing for me.

Sarita Boyette said...

I'm behind on commenting, but I loved your Easter pictures - hope you had a blessed Easter. God is so good, isn't he?