Blessed Be His Name

Then Job arose, tore his robe, and shaved his head; and he fell to the ground and worshipped. And he said:
"Naked I came from my mother's womb,
And naked shall I return there.
The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away;
Blessed be the name of the Lord."~ Job 1:20-21

This week as I turned to the scriptures in Psalms, I noticed that the pages of my bible were wrinkled in spots from my tears. I ran my fingers over the bumpy pages, struck by the thought that my Father in heaven has kept every one of those tears in a bottle. My tears, my heart, my cries are precious to Him. I closed my eyes and remembered the times I have clung to His word in the middle of the night...the times when all I could do was cry and search His word. On my knees...on my face...weeping in His arms.

I will bless the Lord at all times;
His praise shall continually be in my mouth... - Psalm 31:1

I will bless the Lord at all times. I will bless Him when He gives. I will bless Him when He takes away. Those seem like just words on a page...easy to write. It is something altogether different to actually experience it.

Years ago, my friend Ginny and I attended a memorial service for families who had lost a baby. It was an amazing experience, and a treasured gift to sit in a room with so many other mothers and fathers who had walked this path. A beautiful woman stood to share the story of her precious baby's birth and death. She shared that she had been studying Psalm 34 prior to giving birth, focusing on the message that we are to bless the Lord at all times. As she held her lifeless baby in her arms with tears streaming down her face, she felt the Lord gently whisper to her heart...

"Will you bless Me now?"

She replied, "Yes Lord, somehow...I will bless You...even now."

I will never forget the grace that shone on that mother's face. For it is by His grace alone that those words can be uttered. Until you have walked in that place, until you are held in the grip of His grace, at the end of yourself...there is no way to know or understand the grace, peace, and strength of which she spoke. But, it exists. I have experienced it myself. That kind of grace is waiting there for those who cling to Him. For those who bless His name in joy and in sorrow. For in all of it, He is worthy to be praised.

The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears,
And delivers them out of all their troubles.
The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart,
And saves such as have a contrite spirit.
Many are the afflictions of the righteous,
But the Lord delivers him out of them all. ~Psalm 34:17-19

God never promised us that we would not face sorrow, trials, loss, afflictions. In fact, the opposite is true. We are to expect many troubles on this earth...many afflictions. But the Lord hears our cries...He is near to those who have a broken heart, and He delivers us out of all our troubles. Blessed be the name of the Lord.

There has been some talk lately among those I dearly admire and respect (Angie and MckMama), mothers who have been held and are still resting in the grip of His grace, about what constitutes as a miracle. I have said for many years that it is easy to praise God and say He is good when all is well...or when you get the physical healing on this earth. We should praise Him for the healing. But He is still worthy to be praised when the miracle is one that can't be seen with human eyes. It is a miracle to watch Him make beauty from ashes in a broken life. It is a miracle to be led through unspeakable pain, step by step with His sufficient grace. It is a miracle to look upon a tiny life that the world may never meet, and then watch Him use that life to touch the world and point souls to Him for comfort. Every breath, every life, every soul is a treasured miracle sent from the very hand of God.

I remember sitting in the waiting room of the maternal fetal medicine specialist as sweet Thomas clung to life in my womb, knowing short of a "miracle" his time on this earth was fleeting. I picked up a magazine that told the story of the miracle of a family's multiple birth. In my weakness, I winced. Yes, God was good and He should be praised when things go well...when we see the miracle with our eyes. But what He has shown me from walking a different path is that God is still good when the baby doesn't live on this earth, when the cancer isn't healed this side of heaven, when the rain pours and the flood waters rise. He is good when He blesses and He is good when He carries us through the storm. He is good when he heals the body and He is good when He saves the soul.

In all things and at all times...blessed be the name of the Lord.
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I know that, even as you read this, many of you are facing struggles and heart ache. My own heart has been heavy as I look at the suffering around me. I have offered unceasing prayers for so many who are currently in the midst of the storm...especially Baby Stellan and my dear bloggy-friend, Jennifer Ross. Several mothers from around the country have written this week requesting Dreams of You Memory Books to honor the lives of their precious children who have left this earth too soon. My own heart is heavy for children who are hurting at school, and for the burdens and anxieties these little ones are facing in our fallen world. Some days I press on with a weary heart. Hopelessness threatens, and then His word reminds me...

Our soul waits for the Lord;
He is our help and our shield.
For our heart shall rejoice in Him.
Because we have trusted in His holy name.
Let Your mercy, O Lord, be upon us,
Just as we hope in You. ~ Psalm 33:20-22

So, press on, I will...hoping in Him...blessing His holy name...

Let's Make a Memory

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We didn't take a lot of extravagant vacations growing up. My mother was a single mom for some of our upbringing...and even when she wasn't, she worked hard to provide what we needed. Most of our vacations consisted of camping trips in southern Ohio or the occasional stay in a log cabin in the mountains of Tennessee. We went to DisneyWorld when I was five or six. And when I was a young mother, we traveled to Myrtle Beach to show young Timothy the ocean.



One summer before mom was too sick to go, we took my little brother, Sean and my oldest son Timothy on several day trips. We would pack a lunch and load up the car with hopes of some fun and the promise that no matter what...we would make a memory. Good or bad, my mother always viewed our experiences as memories that we would someday laugh about or smile reminiscently as we remembered. The time it rained all night on a camping trip, while we laid huddled in a little dome tent trying to avoid the rain seeping in the holes of the tent...it was just another memory. And, it became even more memorable when we started sliding down the hill due to the increasingly wet mud beneath our tent! Oh...how we laughed! The giddy excitement mom displayed when she could finally buy a brand new tent, cooler and pie irons for our camping trip (instead of the hand-me-downs chocked full of character we had always used before!)...it was a memory. The bickering, sweaty little boys we drug to a restaurant after a long day at Sea World...another memory. Getting lost...almost everywhere we went...memories. The dark walls of Ohio Caverns...the ghost town...the lazy river at Cedar Point...and the deep belly giggles as we were knocked down over and over again at the wave pool in Soak City. There are a million examples of mom saying..."Well, at least we're making a memory." I guess it came from a lifetime of experience making lemonade from the lemons life handed her over and over again. But, she was grateful for the little things...and she taught me to be the same way. It is a gift to be content with the simple gifts of life...and I'm so glad she passed it on to me.


As spring blooms and will soon slip into another summer, I hope you will take the time to make memories with your family as well. It doesn't have to cost a lot. And the conditions don't even have to be perfect. Everything can fall apart...expectations can go unmet...you can get lost...never even make it to your destination...sleep in a leaky tent...tip the canoe and watch your lunch float down the river...and you can still smile, knowing with confidence that you are "making a memory"!

Joy Comes in the Morning

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One promise spoke to my heart in the dark of night. One answer to my heart's cry.
Weeping may endure for a night, But joy comes in the morning. Psalm 30:5b Years ago, while in the midst of asking "How long..." I held on to these words...to this beautiful promise. I would weep. And my night would last awhile. I wondered how long it would be until morning would come to our house to stay. Morning did come and brought with it the gift of joy. And the next time night brings the weeping, we will hold on to the same promise...knowing that joy will come in the morning because our God is faithful.

He is the One who turns our mourning into dancing...

You have turned my mourning into dancing; You have put off my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness, To the end that my glory may sing praise to You and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give thanks to you forever. ~ Psalm 30:11-12

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Often, my own limitations distract me from the confidence we have in the Lord. Juggling family roles, work, the ministry...I sometimes feel inadequate for the tasks of the day. There are some encouraging truths in 2 Timothy...too many to mention in this post. But I wanted to share a few that really spoke to my weary heart right now. Sometimes, the Lord teaches us in themes. And lately, one of the themes He has spoken to my heart is that serving Him is not about my ability to perform...but about God's ability to work in and through my life.
...who has saved us and called us with a holy calling, not according to our works, but according to His own purpose and grace which was given to us in Christ Jesus before time began...~ 2 Timothy 1:9 He saved us...He calls us to serve Him...according to His purpose...with grace given to us in Christ Jesus...not because of anything we do on our own. And His plans for our lives were in place before time began.

Later, in chapter 2:21 we are encouraged to be "a vessel for honor, sanctified and useful for the Master, prepared for every good work". Throughout 2 Timothy, we are encouraged to study God's word (chapter 3:17)"that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work". He will equip us to do the work He calls us to do. Our part is to abide with Him...to seek Him in prayer...to study His word...to trust in Him. He does the rest. He will prepare...He will equip...thoroughly.
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And today, as my heart is heavy with the struggles of so many grieving mothers and families facing obstacles these words encourage me to carry on:
Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart,
All you who hope in the Lord. ~Psalm 31:24Z

As a mother, there are many things that I cannot protect my children from, although I would like to. I wish I could keep them from harm or illness. From falling into sin or making mistakes that could change their lives. I want to keep them from evil...or the dangers of this world. The nightly news alone could keep a mama's heart from resting at night. The fear would smother and overwhelm me, except for this truth: For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. ~2 Timothy 1:7 I am clinging to this verse as a mom right now...holding on to His promises, believing His truth, resting in His ability to protect and guide us as parents...and to guide our children throughout their lives. And when they are afraid, in the dark of night...I will remind them of this verse as well.

Praying for so many of you out there as well...Be of good courage, sweet friends. He shall strengthen your heart...Hope in Him...

Praying for Stellan

Many of you probably already read MckMama's blog. Her little MckMiracle, Baby Stellan, needs our prayers. He experienced heart problems in the womb that doctors said would certainly cause his death. He did not die, though. Sweet Stellan lived and when he was born, doctors said there was no evidence of the heart condition previously diagnosed. His healing was a miracle...and we collectively praised the Lord. Stellan has been thriving at home...a happy, healthy beautiful miracle. Last night, he was taken to the ER with respiratory concerns. He was given albuterol treatments and then his heart rate raised to dangerous levels...just like the levels reached when he was in the womb. He was rushed to Children's Hospital and is now in the PICU. Doctors have tried several medications to lower his heart rate to no avail. Please click here to read updates on Stellan's situation. Please pray for his healing, for peace and comfort for McKMama and Prince Charming...and for their entire family, and for wisdom for the doctors. Please, please, please pray.

If one part (of the body of Christ) suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it. ~I Corinthians 12:26

When the Waters Rise...

The past couple years we have experienced a lot of flooding in our area. Many of our friends had damage to their houses, including our neighbors whose basement flooded several times. The creek behind our house flooded more than once. The boys and I stood by the window and just watched the water rise. It carried the sandbox away and rose up the side of the swing set. We were fortunate. Others, who lived close to the river, lost everything. The waters never reached our house, but as the filthy water rose...we watched and waited with dread.

Lately, everywhere I look, the waters are rising. Not just the waters surrounding me. Many stand right now, watching the waters rise. So many are facing spiritual attack...the condemnation that whispers lies in the darkness, planting doubt and spreading fear. Some praying for the life of their child. Some praying for the strength to face another day without their child. Some cry alone, and walk numbly through their days without the one they love. Some are left with only broken pieces of a family. And some watch helplessly, unable to make the sick well or the broken whole. So many without a job...or enough income...discouraged and weary. Some are facing uncertainty...life is taking a new direction...the unknown awaits, and they stand in the midst of the fog ready to take a step of blind faith, unsure of what this new life may hold. And the waters rise.

So, what do we do while we watch the waters rise around us, wondering if they will overtake us? In the sea of grief...in the uncertainty of the unknown...in the hopelessness that threatens, what do we do when the waters rise?

Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by your name;
You are Mine.
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
And through the rivers, they shall not overflow you.
When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned,
Nor shall the flame scorch you.
For I am the Lord your God,
The Holy One of Israel, your Savior;
~ Isaiah 43:1b-3a

We hold on...to the hope we have in Him. We hold on until we are too weak, too weary, too overcome. We hold on until we can't anymore. And then, He holds on to us. As the waters rush in over our heads and we let go...He grabs our hands as we are sinking. And He lifts us to higher ground. He holds us until we are able to hold on again. He whispers to our hearts, "Pay no attention to the rushing waters rising around you, dear one. For I have redeemed you...I have called you by name...you are Mine...I will be with you...I will hold you above the waters. Trust in Me...for I am the Lord, your God."

When the waters rise...when it looks hopeless or impossible...remember His promise to you and keep your eyes fixed on Him.

Do not remember the former things,
Nor consider the things of old.
Behold, I will do a new thing,
Now it shall spring forth;
Shall you know it?
I will even make a road in the wilderness
And rivers in the desert.
~Isaiah 43:18-19

When the waters rise, the One who makes rivers in the desert holds me...and He will hold you, too.

Being Carried...

To You, O Lord, I lift up my soul.
Oh my God, I trust in You;
Let me not be ashamed...
Psalm 25:1-2

Lead me in Your ways, O LORD;
Teach me Your paths,
Lead me in Your truth and teach me,
For You are the God of my salvation;
On You I wait all day.
Psalm 25:4-5

Oh, His word pours over me like a healing balm this morning. What sweet relief to surrender...to be carried in His loving arms. What blessed assurance awaits us in His embrace. What sufficient grace for every moment...every step of trusting in Him. What peace that surpasses all human understanding.

I do not have words to convey what your prayers have meant to me. Thank you for your willingness to pray for me...for my family. Last night, I was carried by your prayers. The need to focus on my family and my duties as a mother, is great. And, I confess, I was not feeling very focused on last night's speaking engagement. I prayed with Becki before we walked into the beautiful home where our meeting took place..."Lord, if this is going to be anything valuable or fruitful or even make sense...it is going to have to be all You. Pour out your grace, speak through me with Your Holy Spirit." On my own, I had nothing to give last night...never have I felt more like "nothing" in my life than before I walked in to share with these beautiful ladies. Physically, I felt weak and exhausted...congested, nauseous, head-achy.

I'm sure they would be shocked to hear that because anyone there would never have known that's how I felt. When I walked into the house and opened my mouth to speak...I was lifted up and carried. With every word, my physical countenance grew stronger, my spirit was encouraged. The Holy Spirit ministered not only to the ladies present, but to my weary soul...my heavy heart. Joy and peace flowed through me. I even ate with vigor the lovely treats the lady of the house shared when I was finished with my presentation. I wish I had the presence of mind to take pictures of her adorable pistachio ice cream cake with hand-made chocolate shamrocks...or her lovely table-setting...or the matching green punch I savored. I felt strengthened and loved in the presence of these amazing, faithful women who love Jesus. The body of Christ is a beautiful thing to behold...and a humbling gift to be part of. If any of them are reading this today...they will never know how much they blessed me last night. These ladies are an excellent example of the body of Christ in action. They are the hands and feet of Jesus. And it was a great honor and blessing to meet them.

When I got into the car to leave, I was immediately congested, filled with nausea, and my headache returned. I knew the entire evening was a God-thing. I had been carried. For that time, I was allowed to float above the circumstances on a cloud of peace. As my own weakness flooded me, I knew that I had walked through the evening in His strength. He equipped me for the task at hand. He poured out the measure of grace I needed to accomplish it. And, even more...He gets all the glory.

Thank you...thank you for your prayers and your words of encouragement. Please continue to pray. We will be prayerfully focused on the needs of our family right now...so please understand if I am sporadic with my posts or less diligent in my commenting. I cherish the relationships I have found through this blog. And I have come to love and appreciate so many of you. As you pray for us, I do want to share that we are not facing anything life-threatening. There are just some changes and adaptations that we will have to work through as a family and as parents right now. It's part of parenting...part of life. We are praying for the Lord's wisdom, peace, and grace. The good news is that, as always, we are being carried by our loving Father...who is more than able.

Struggling a Little...

I hesitate to even write this, but I covet your prayers. We have some unspoken family concerns that need prayer. We are praying for strength and wisdom...and the Lord's healing touch on this situation. Believe it or not, I am very private and protective about my family. At least that would be my inclination, if the Lord wasn't constantly calling me out of my comfort zone to share our journey in hopes that others could find comfort. (Please don't hear that wrong. I gladly lay down my desire for security and privacy to obey His call. It is a privilege to serve Him...and it blesses my life more than if I would hide in my comfort zone!)

This evening, I am going to speak to a women's church group about Sufficient Grace Ministries. This morning, I have a raging sinus infection, a heavy heart, and a distracted mind. Please pray for our family as we take another step into an unknown place. And, please pray for me as I prepare to speak...for my health, for focus, that the Holy Spirit would lead and give the words, that His sufficient grace would be poured over me. And that the ladies at the event would find hope, comfort, and blessing in their time this evening. When this task is complete, please pray that I could focus with all my mommy-heart on my family and their increasing needs right now.

As, we face the next thing, I know our God is big enough to handle what comes. I think of what Angie Smith said, when she first heard that her Audrey Caroline had a fatal condition. She said, "My Jesus is the same...". We take comfort in knowing that our Jesus is the same...yesterday, today, and for always. Our circumstances may change...but His promises, His strength, His grace, His mercy, and His love will always remain the same. We are secure in our steadfast God. The same God who parted the Red Sea holds us in His arms today. He is just as able, just as mighty, and just as willing to care for us and meet our needs as He was then.

It is hard to share my weakness this morning...and my need for your prayers. I like to present a picture that I have it all together. Those that know me well...know otherwise! I think, "I'm trusting my Lord and He is able, so I can handle whatever it is". I'd rather share with you our journeys after we've walked through the valley and look back to see God's hand and His sufficient grace carrying us. After He has already restored us. It's another thing entirely to come asking for prayer while still in pieces, feeling broken and weak. But here I am...please pray.